After four years on a dramatic rollercoaster of emotions, it looked like Camila and Lauren were finally done for good, especially with Camila ready to leave Fifth Harmony. However, that didn't mean that the drama ended there, or that 'Camren' did ei...
"Elton John came out years after he started making music and after years of success.", he countered as he took his hands off of me, "Ricky Martin, same situation. Any big names you think of were supposedly straight while they were climbing the ladder to success. Timing is extremely important."
"Ok, but they're also artists from ages ago! Dozens of people are starting out already openly gay or come out pretty soon after getting started now. It's a different time."
"But not a single one of those is at the global level that I'm talking about. The level that you want to be at. The level I know that you can reach."
"Roger, for me it's always been about the music and the fans and touching people's hearts."
"And you can't do that at the scale that you deserve to if you make the wrong move here. I know it's frustrating , but I also know that you understand this and that you know what I'm saying is true. Otherwise, you would've pulled the trigger and come out already."
I felt my stomach sink. He was right. I couldn't help but think back to how Lauren came out. The team had outed her in the way they wanted, but she still chose to add her own flair to it. She had that strength in her that I could just never muster up. In the end, I would always obey; I would always do what I had to because I did have that goal of global success in mind. This was my dream.
The green eyed girl had even asked me why I hadn't come out yet during one of our heated arguments. She knew the truth too; I was all talk. I spent too much time talking about what I wanted, but didn't have the strength or courage to make it happen. It was happening again, right now, with Roger. He would win this argument like he always did.
Unless he didn't.
"A person can only be pushed for so long. Eventually, they break." I said, not breaking eye contact for a second.
"You're too smart to break over something like this." he said, a hint of warning in his tone.
"Something like this? Roger...I'm starting to feel horribly inauthentic. My fans know. They know and a lot of them share this with me and I would love to be able to openly share it with them and to be able to date whoever I want and to not have to lug a fake boyfriend around all the time. I left Fifth Harmony because I felt restricted. I don't want to feel that way anymore. I know that this is a process and I know that this could possibly hinder my growth. I know all of this, but I also know that I've come a long way and that I'm not sure how much longer I can take hiding a big piece of my life from everyone."
"Until the time is right."
"Give me a timeline."
"What?"
"Give me something to hope for here, Roger. Or else I'll..."
"You'll what, Camila? You'll get a new manager?"
Roger stood there staring back at me with his hands on his hips, his challenge hanging in the air. Honestly, I didn't know what I was threatening to do. I just needed him to know how serious I was about this. This was the last aspect of my life that was keeping me from being completely and totally free. I had really had enough.
"Or else I'll do it myself." I finally said.
Roger scoffed as he moved to cross his arms. He scratched his chin while he continued to stare at me intently.
"Good luck." was all that he said before walking away.
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