Crossing the Mirage - Passing Through Youth

Chapter 11 - Crossing the Mirage

While Nithya bowed her head narrating her tale of woe, Chandra glued his eyes on her. When she finished, as she looked at him to gauge his response, he bestowed her with his caressing look of love. Overwhelmed, she cried for the empathy he evoked in her.

"Oh, God," Chandra said in sorrow, "how sad!."

"What to do when someone deceives you?" said Nithya sighing. "See what a mess I'm in now!"

"So you want to get aborted?"

"Why don't you help me?" she clutched his hand involuntarily. "I've no clue how to go about it."

"I value your trust in me," he said placing his on hers, "as much as I value you. But is abortion a solution?"

"Tell me," she said helplessly, "what else can I do now?"

"Why, life has a way of shadowing problems with opportunities," he said looking into her eyes tentatively.

"Having undone my life," she said with a sense of rejection, "what opportunity can I possibly have now?"

"Marriage, for one."

"Are you joking or what?"

"Why," he said, "won't you like to put this all behind and get on with your life?"

"But even then I need this abortion, won't I?"

"You could abort the child," he said as his tone drew all the empathy his heart felt for her, "but would you be able to get rid of your guilt?"

"Aren't you scaring me even more?"

"Oh no," he said taking her hand, "you know I wish you well. Why not see what the options are and their likely impact upon your life."

"Thank God, at least, I've chosen a friend well," she said in admiration. "Please be my friend, philosopher, and guide."

"Thanks for the offer and know it's accepted," he said in all happiness.

"Wonder how you make me feel relaxed!" she said. "Now tell me what the solution could be."

"Well, we'll go through the options for you to arrive at the solution," he said. "For one, you can get aborted and marry someone on the sly."

"Right or wrong," she said bowing her head, "that's what girls in my situation do, don't they?"

"Well, that's the only option available for the most of them," he said endearingly. "But it's not the case with you."

"How is it different with me?"

"Before we come to that," he said in the manner of counseling her, "why not visualize the pitfalls of marriage on the sly? Won't your conscience prick you if you marry by hiding your past?"

"I haven't thought about it so far," she said and paused for a while. "Oh, I'll surely suffer from qualms all my life."

"What's worse, what if Vasu blackmails you?" he said as softly as he could so as not to raise her fears. "If you give in, won't it tell upon your conscience, and if not, what if he makes your man privy to your past? Wouldn't it be like between the devil and the deep sea?"

"Oh, God!" she cried. "Looks like I've made myself vulnerable forever. What am I to do now?"

Shaken to the core, she looked at him for support.

"What if you reveal all to the prospective groom?" he said sounding as detached as possible from the proposal. "Won't you clear your conscience and block the blackmail as well?"

"You know the premium you men put on wife's virginity," she said as though she was discounting the idea. "And that being the case, who would want to marry me?"