Between Love and Hate

Chapter 18 (The Girls)

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Warning: contains sexual content, language, graphic explanations of self harm and eating disorders, mentions of self harm and eating disorders.

Jackie

"Harry you FU-"

I heard Louis letting out a squeak as he disappeared from my sight, inside Harry's room.

"Louis?", I asked, my voice shaking as I stepped closer, then through the small opening of the door.

My heart literally stopped and it felt like it just fell out of my chest. Louis was on his knees by Harry's side.

Harry was laying across the floor, his shirt and sweatpants stained with blood. His wrists were exposed and I had to put a hand over my mouth to stop myself from sobbing at the sight of his extremely deep cuts.

My eyes fell to the two little empty bottles a few feet away from him. Their lids were gone.

I threw myself on my knees next to Louis, who was freaking out, crying as he shook Harry.

"Harry, Harry. Wake up mate this isn't funny.", he said sternly.

I bit my lip, tasting the salt of my tears.

"Call an ambulance.", I said as I bent down over him to check if he was breathing. He wasn't. Shit.

"Is he breathing?", Louis asked as he brought his phone to his ear.

His eyes were red and puffy as I shook my head, biting my lip.

"Hel-lo?", he said into the phone and I looked back at Harry.

My tears were slipping from my cheeks onto Harry's, and I grabbed his right wrist, looking close at his cuts. They were scary deep. I cried harder when I saw that the skin on his right hand was burnt a bit. Robin, I thought as I let go of his hand.

"Fuck, FUCK!", Louis yelled getting up after he finished talking to the lady, who said he should stay on the line. But he hung up, because he wasn't emotionally stable.

I looked up at him and blinked a few times to see him clearly through my tears.

He went and punched the door, before he buried his face into his palms.

My lip trembled. It was my fault Harry was like this. If I hadn't left in the morning because my dad called me home, he wouldn't have done what he did. He would've been alright, I would've stopped him.

"Louis.", I said softly as he started pacing around the room.

"No, don't fucking LOUIS me! Look at him, for fuck's sake, Jackie! He's probably dead! Shit, fuck. Oh god, I'm going to...he's dead. He's dead."

"No, don't say that, Lo-"

"Shit, shit fuck.", he kept repeating.

We heard the sirens from outside before Louis practically exited the room through the door. I followed him outside. An ambulance stopped in front of Harry's house.

I hugged myself as Louis ran towards the paramedics and pointed to the shed.

Nearly ten people ran in that direction and all I could do was watch their backs as they disappeared in the shed. We weren't allowed inside, since it was pretty crowded and Harry needed professional assistance.

I saw Robin exit the house in a rush, swearing around, asking what happened. His eyes immediately fell on me, before he looked towards the shed.

He marched towards it, pushing people out of his way and yelling out curse words.