Stucky Oneshots WoOhOo

In The Closet

As shitty as being on the run from the government was, the look on ex-secretary Ross's face was hilarious.

Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Sam, and Wanda stood onstage in front of hundreds of photographers and reporters, and every one of them were fighting shit-eating grins off of their faces.

"I have had the pleasure of serving my country since I was twenty-seven. However, judging my past mistakes, the government has asked for me to..." Ross flared his nostrils, "Step down."

Steve's lips twitched into a tiny smirk. He caught sight of Tony at the back of the room and raised an eyebrow. Tony merely grinned and gave him a two fingered salute.

"...I haven't been informed who will take over once I have left office." Ross clenched his jaw. "That being said, I'm going to ask Colonel James Rhodes to answer any questions you may have." He marched offstage, shooting a glare at Steve, who smirked.

"Having fun, Rogers?" Bucky leaned into his side. Steve huffed. "As much fun as I can have. I always hated these damn conferences."

"I'll make it worthwhile once we get home," Bucky promised. "We just gotta wave a little, be diplomatic."

"Yeah, yeah."

_______

Steve loved Brooklyn. He loved Bucky. Imagine how happy he was when he was living with Bucky in Brooklyn.

He was so happy, in fact, he broke the bed.

Bucky still hadn't stopped laughing.

"It's been ten minutes, Steve," he wheezed, "how the hell."

"Shut up," Steve grumbled, pulling up his pants. "I hate you."

Bucky pouted. "That's not very nice."

"Neither is making fun of your best guy," Steve shot back. Bucky snorted. "That's weak, Rogers."

Steve stuck his tongue out at him before pecking him on the cheek. "Shut your face, jerk."

Someone knocked on their apartment door, making them help and jump apart. Steve scrambled to fix his hair while Bucky opened the door to a mass of people holding various quantities of alcohol. Natasha was in the front, holding a bottle of Russian vodka. "We've come to celebrate. Thor and company are here too."

Steve appeared next Bucky, his hair substantially neater. "When did Thor get here?"

Thor pushed his way to the front of the group. "We just killed my sister! Also, look who isn't dead!" He held Loki above his head. Steve blinked. "What."

Bucky snorted and opened the door wider. "Come on in."

By the time everyone was inside, the countertops were filled with alcohol and food. Tony had even gone so far as to buy Spirytus Rektyfikowany to see if Steve would have any response to it. Steve immediately took the challenge. It burned his throat substantially as it went down, but end the end had no effect on his metabolism.

Bucky tried it too. His serum wasn't nearly as strong as Steve's, so he was wasted by his sixth shot.

"Steve," he slurred. "Steve, why're there two of you?" He poked Steve's ear. "Boop," he giggled. Steve snorted and handed him a glass of water. "Drink." Bucky drained the glass, spilling half of it on himself.

The rest of the room was either drunk or passed out except for Thor and Natasha, who were dragging people to their respective suites. Steve carried Bucky to the mattress that he had dragged away from the broken bed frame. "Get some sleep. I'll check on you in an hour."