Mess

Epilogue

Graduation. Prom. Never did I think two years ago I’d be here, not with all that drama I had going on all around me. And college. I never thought I would get into a good college, with my friends there, too. To put it sweetly, I’m so fucking happy with my life right now.

If you’re wondering about Scott…well, let’s just say we’ve remained good friends. Problem is, sometimes the sexual tension gets too much, and the electricity between us is a little too wild. Like tonight, the way he looks at me in my dress, how he keeps touching me more than usual, it’s…intense. Way too intense for just two “friends” going to prom together. I’m lucky he even let me out of his sight to sit down here for a few minutes, so I could have a moment to myself. I just want to take it all in, really.

I’d describe the tone for tonight as…extreme emotion. Evie is pretty upset because Kit couldn’t make it, he’s all caught up at college. He enrolled at Pacific Oaks College last year, and I’m over the moon…heck, over the entire universe with the fact that Scott and I will also be enrolling there this August. Luckily it’s in Pasadena, so it’s a short drive from here, meaning I’ll be able to come visit often. I had the option to stay living at home, but I really wanted the full, on campus college experience. I might even apply for a sorority…wait, fuck no. But I’m happy to share an actual dorm room with an actual roommate.

Evie is also all sensitive at the moment because she got into two colleges she can’t pick between: Pacific Oaks, and Art Center College of Design, which is a really good school to do film, which is exactly what she wants to do. So she’s having to choose between being with her best friends and her boyfriend, or a school beneficial for her future. I’m trying to remain impartial, because I know she should go to film school, but then I really want her in college with me and Kit and Scott.

Another aspect of tonight’s extreme emotion is the tension between our clique and Wanda and Serena’s clique. Yeah. Things never did patch up between us and Wanda. However, I did eventually find out why Serena had some crazy vendetta against me. Both her parents died, in a mugging incident, a couple months before my mom died. She mourned silently and apparently I mourned more outwardly, meaning more people gave me sympathy. She thought I was nothing but a pathetic sob story, who loved the attention people gave me. That’s why she hated me so much. After hearing that, though, I don’t hate her. I just feel sorry for her. Nevertheless, things are unresolved. It’s us in one corner and them in another, just like it’s always been. And although it’s civil, it’s such a damn shame that we couldn’t all come together for one last time. It’s nothing that can’t be ignored, though.

Moving on with the extreme emotion, well, there’s a lot of anxiousness between Raymond and Noah. Raymond broke up with his girlfriend in junior year, and only at the beginning of senior year, he proposed that him and Noah start dating, taking it slow. It got sort of compromised during the heat of coursework and exams, but then Ramond asked Noah out to prom as their first ever public appearance as a couple amongst all our friends, and you can just feel the apprehensiveness radiating from the two, who are at the moment getting a drink of spiked punch together. But I know they’ll be fine.

And then of course, there’s the sexual tension between me and Scott. Oh, and how coincidental—Scott is walking up to me right now. The way his usual soft ocean stare seems so fiery and penetrating tonight makes me feel so nervous. But then also, a little turned on. It’s all so weird, the feeling completely contradicts the way I’m supposed to feel about him. We’re just friends. I stare down at my dress and try to straighten out a crease that has appeared near the hem. I’m quite happy with my dress, actually. A lot of girls went all out and got sparkly, princess-y dresses but I kept it plain and simple. I’m wearing a white fitted dress, with an asymmetric neckline and cut-cross back. It goes perfectly with strapped white high heels, which I’ll admit are quite uncomfortable to walk in but they make me feel so tall and confident. I had my hair done at the namely best salon in town, my brown roots have a lighter golden colour and I have some blonde highlights, so I look way more blonde than caramel-brown now. The only other form of decoration I have on are the plain silver studs resting comfortably in my earlobes, and the bright red lipstick shaping my lips to accompany my otherwise plain makeup. I actually feel way older than eighteen, I feel old enough to be, perhaps, I don’t know. A young, hot mom, or something.