Whole (a Sam Wilkinson / Sammy Wilk fanfic)

// CHAPTER XIV //

SOPHIE's POV
It's literally been three days since Sammy slept over and we said we were dating and he hasn't even called. I'm pissed. I'm an idiot. Of course he hasn't called he just wanted to have sex probably and since I said no to that he's probably butt hurt. We were supposed to start things on my bucket list but he said he had to go home quick and come back later and he didn't. It's whatever. I'm used to it. I run up the stairs and see his shirt on my bed. I throw it on the floor. "God, I fucking hate how easy I trust people." I say aloud. I look at my bucket list and lay down on my bed. "Go water skiing, fall in love, get roses sent to me, have a midnight adventure, sleep on the beach." Wow, these are all dumb but I don't really care. It seems like fun and I have until the end of summer so. I look at my phone and I have no texts. I go on Twitter and see if Sammy tweeted anything and he hasn't. He probably posted on Instagram. Nope. Maybe snapchat? Nope. That's weird. He's a social media addict. That's how he's known any - OH. I open my vine app and go to his page. Absolutely nothing. What the hell? I toss my phone behind me and sigh. I get up and look at my wall. I smile looking at my birthday photos until I see the torn one. I shiver. I know I shouldn't have put it up but I need to remember my birthdays. I wonder where 'he' is. Just then I hear someone open my the front door and my heart jumps. Mom isn't supposed to be home for two more days. My dogs are caged outside so they can't help. Oh my god. I grab my phone and hide in the back of my closet. I hear heavy footsteps and breathing. I hear them open the hall closet and the bathroom. Then I hear my door open. They walk near my bed and stop. I hear something get picked up. I hear a sigh. Then they walk toward my wall. I'm holding my breath. Then the closet door starts to move. Oh my god.
"Sophie? Why the hell are you hiding in the closet?!" It's Sam.
I jump out. "Why the fuck haven't you called in three days? I'm your 'whole world' for a night and then you just blow me off like nothing?"
"Why the fuck is my shirt on the floor, why the fuck are you hiding in a fucking closet?"
"Shut up! You just left me for three days! Did you not hear me? I'm so stupid to think I could've fallen for a guy in less than a day. Honestly I'm so stupid. I'm just dumb." I say with so much self hate it's painful for me to even say it. Tears start to form in my eyes.
"Soph.." I push his arm off and walk over to the shirt. "Here, take your shirt. I'm sorry this is so stupid honestly I can't just date a guy I met and I'm being irrational. The whole date I must've been delusional to even think I could trust you. I'm just some dumb girl who you and your fucking friends laugh about. Take your fucking shirt." I shove it into his arms.
"Sophie, stop."
"Can you please get out?"
"Sophie."
"FUCKING LEAVE. I KNOW I sound so crazy but I'm so dumb for even accepting to date you. I don't want to date you, I don't want to be near you and I don't even want to talk to you."
"Sophie CAN YOU FUCKING LET ME TALK."
His yell makes the tear slowly run down my cheek.
"Fucking talk then." I say and wipe my eye.
"Shit, now you're fucking crying? God, I come to apologize and tell you I'm here to take you for the bucket list and you want me to go? I was terrified to call you because I couldn't stop thinking about you. And honestly that freaks me out because I always thought of girls as just another thing to have for fun. But the fact you were on my mind the past three days freaked me out. I know, I know I should've came back but I couldn't. It's just weird. And I know you're pissed off but you didn't even call me either. It made me feel like I was just shit to you."
I look at him, and he's running his hands through his hair. I know he isn't lying. But I'm too stubborn.
"Sam."
"Yeah?" I see the hope in his eye.
"Leave."
"Sophie, I -"
"Leave. Honestly leave, this is ridiculous I'm finishing this fucking bucket list on my own. I don't care about having a boyfriend. I don't care about you I never did. You're shit to me. You're an idiot who makes vine videos, I'm a fuck up who believes you. Nothing I said I meant. I don't care if you're here or not. The past three days I could've cared less about you. You're shit Sam. You're like every other guy I know. All you do is lie about liking girls so you can just add a body to your fucking dumb count. You don't think I know you're out of my league? You just want me to feel like I'm so special because Sammy Wilk wants me even though you don't. I don't care about you, I regret meeting you, you and your dumb friends who make vines and can happily leave my life and it'll be amazing. So please leave." I say and grab my phone and sit on my bed.
He stares at me. "To fucking think I thought I finally found the girl." He picks up his shirt. Then looks at me. He drops it back on the floor. "Keep it, so when you feel shitty about giving up a guy like me you can at least have my fucking shirt. It's the least I can do. I'll just go fuck a fan because they actually will be grateful Sammy fucking Wilk fucked them."
And with that he leaves. When I hear the front door slam I start to cry. Oh my god I've never lied so fucking much in life until that bullshit I told Sam. I hit myself and cry. I'm so fucking dumb. I fuck up everything. He can get any girl in the world, how dumb am I to think I was the one for him.
SAMMY's POV
I slam the front door. And walk to my car and slam it shut. I slam my hands on the wheel the car beeps. "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?" I yell even though no one is listening. I'm such an asshole. I'm not even fucking famous and I fucking acted so cocky. Oh my god I like, even love her so much and she's gone. I knew I should've came back that day. But I couldn't. I lied. I was planning to go on a weekend trip with her. I even had fucking bags packed. I was going to make sure we marked off everything on that fucking bucket list. I even made my own to go along with hers. I reach back and move over the luggage, and grab the list. I grab the pen and scribble everything out. I rip it up and throw it out the window. I start up the car and drive away. How is it that every time I try to do something right it goes wrong? I hope she wears my shirt. But she probably doesn't care. Oh my god she doesn't care. I can't clear my mind. I drive on back roads. I speed on curves and slam on my breaks. She's probably smiling and laughing right now. She doesn't need me. Oh my god how the hell. She lied to me the whole time. She can get any guy in the world of course I mean nothing to her. Besides, that bucket list was shit. She was my fucking bucket list. And now I'll never be able to mark her down as mine.