One sided love (DeltaRune: Susie x Noelle)

❀ Chapter eight ❀

"Mother, nobody else needs to know about this.  My goal isn't to let the whole world that I am a lesbian!" She told her mother as she took a bite from her food. "I just want you and father to be supportive and accepting of me."

What is it you're trying to say, mother?

"You're right. The world does not need to know that you're gay...." Noelle heard her mother sigh out.

"But I unfortunately found out."

Noelle could feel her heart drop and her face instantly changed to a pained expression. The pain in her chest had returned, now feeling worse than before. Noelle placed her hand on her chest and breathed deeply. She felt more tears well up in her eyes and she stared at her mother in silence. Oh my god... She thought out to herself, I ruined everything. I ruined my relationship with my mother. I can't believe..

Her mother paused for a moment, almost as if she was lost in thought. Noelle opened her mouth to say something back, but a pathetic little squeak came out only to be cut off by her mother.

"Noelle. I will forget that this happened but if I hear anything about this again, I will be very displeased. You are also going to break up with this girl immediately."

"Mother--"

"Noelle." Her mother raised her voice and cut her off. "I want you to realize that living life as a gay monster is very difficult! It would he hard to make friends, and you will only get bullied for it! I am looking out for you, Noelle. Do you understand?! I care about you!"

Noelle sniffled. She opened her mouth to say something. "Mother, it's already hard making friends as it is! I get harassed all the time! Get over it!" was what she wanted to say, but she couldn't say it. It would only ruin her mother's mood even more. Her mouth closed shut and she felt her tears slide down her fuzzy cheeks. She could only muster out a tiny, "Okay.." to her mother.

Her mother sighed out and put another forkful of penne into her mouth. She chewed and swallowed, cleaning her face afterwards with her napkin. She muttered something under her breath. "What are you going to do next? Cut your hair short like a dyke?"

Her mother probably just said it to herself and not to Noelle, but Noelle easily heard that comment. The small girl suddenly pulled her body up and she slammed her hands on the table. Her mother looked up at her, and Noelle stared her right in the eyes. The girl didn't bother wiping the tears that were now streaming down her face. You know what? I can't take it! She thought out.

She had many things to say and oh, she was going to say them! There was no stopping her now!

"Mother?" The girl quietly asked. Noelle's mother opened her mouth, but her daughter cut her off. "You know what... Get the fuck over it!" Noelle's mother gasped a bit, never hearing her daughter swear. Hell.. Noelle barely swore herself and she only swore when she got extremely angry. "You can't change who I am! So what if I am a lesbian and like girls?! I'm still the same old me as I was any other day! I'm not going to change myself right here and now just because I told you I like girls!" And you said that it would be difficult for me to make friends?!" She let out a dry laugh, "Its already fucking hard to make friends and nobody else at that school knows I am a lesbian!" She turned away and kicked her chair which slid across the wooden floor a few metres. "I am clearly unlikeable if nobody wants to be my friend!"

She stormed out of the kitchen, leaving her mother alone.

Her mother slowly put her fork down on top or her plate and didn't say or do anything back as Noelle left. She wanted to go after her daughter but she decided to leave the girl alone for a bit.

Maybe she shouldn't have said anything back and tried to understand her daughter's feelings instead? Maybe she's too stuck in the past? "Damn it." She muttered, "Rudy...what would you have said?"

Noelle went upstairs and slammed the door as loud as she could when she walked into her room. She leaned against the door and slid down to a sitting position. Tears were pouring out of her eyes and down her cheeks and she wiped them away with her sleeves. "I shouldn't have said anything.." She began to cry out, "I'm such an idiot. Why the heck would I have thought this would be a good idea?!"

She got back up to a standing position and slowly walked over to her bed. She wanted to text Susie about what happened. Maybe Susie would comfort the upset girl? Noelle sure hoped so. She sat on top of her bed and pulled out her phone, giving Susie a text.

To: Susie
From: Noelle
Time: 5:45 pm

So, I told my mother that I am gay, and she didn't like it. I shouldn't have told her in the first place haha..

I messed up big time.

And send!

Noelle read over the text and she found herself wiping some more tears away. She prayed that Susie would say something nice back to help cheer her up. She didn't have high hopes, but one can only pray. Susie didn't seem to be replying instantly so Noelle turned to play a few phone games. A few minutes later she got a notification. She clicked it and read it instantly.

To: Noelle
From: Susie
Time: 5:49 pm

Oof. That sucks ass.

It's... The thought that counts? Noelle didn't seem to be feeling any better after reading that, but she wanted to keep talking with Susie. She texted her back to keep a conversation.

To: Susie
From: Noelle
Time: 5:49 pm

Anyways...What are you doing? How are you?

Noelle sent off the text and a minute later she got a reply from Susie.

To: Noelle
From: Susie
Time: 5:50 pm

Playing Smash with Kris.

Crap..

Noelle quickly replied with something dumb like 'okay' and she put her phone down on the side of her bed. She felt awful for texting Susie while she was playing video games. She felt like she was bugging the other girl.

Noelle looked over at her game system. She felt her stomach growling, but she didn't want to go back downstairs and deal with her mom again. Noelle let a small sigh out and got up off of her bed and looked for any games to play. She didn't want to play Zorro without Susie and she searched around and found another game. She grabbed it and swapped it with the Zorro game.

She played the other game alone for a few hours until she decided it was time to go to bed. Thankfully, playing the game calmed her down a bit. She saved her progress and shut it off and put the controller away. Noelle changed into her pajamas and brushed her teeth and did her usual evening routine before crawling under her warm blankets. After thinking about the whole day for a while, she noticed her eyes were slowly starting to close.

Noelle's chest was killing her.

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