coping is something phil's never really had to do. he's always been happy-go-lucky and carefree, but now he has to deal with dan's tears that occur at least once a day. he tries to hide it, goes into the other room, even, but phil can tell he's been crying when he comes back. it's something about the way he breathes, like every breath is worth a million pounds but pains him to take.
phil's past crying at this point. sure, he feels completely shredded at any given moment, but it's like his body has dried up.
and, for some reason, the minutes stand up on end, now. they're the same amount of time, but their configuration is changed.
dan meets phil's eyes and his jaw tightens instinctively. responding instantaneously, phil scoots over to him and they lay there on the couch in silence.
that's one nice thing about knowing you're going to die. it gives you the ability to completely zero in on something. not even the earth shattering could break phil's focus on the feeling of dan's hands in his and their legs intertwined.
he's going to need every second he can get.
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pretend you're awake » phan
Fanfiction❝everything's got a reason, dan.❞ ❝not this. not this, phil.❞ in which phil is being killed from the inside out. lowercase intended.
