My Marshal And Me//Lisoo 리수 [Complete]

Chap. 16: If it isn't you

It was a week since the day of the mission, during the time Lisa was recovering we stayed at the gang base. Luckily, Lisa situation wasn't that serious because of the fast intervention of the three young doctors.

Jisoo kept feeling guilty even though everyone told her she didn't have any reason to feel that way, taking care of her Marshal as best as she could, but she also had to recover because she was quite traumatized. Lisa was finally able to move around even though her injuries weren't completely healed, but she was just someone tough so she decided to go back to work. In the meantime Red and Axe were back in prison, we and the two cadets were now back at the Academy.

«Okay» I started talking to the two cadets who were now unpacking «from now on, no more funny business. Jihyo you have to be done with the course before being free to do whatever you want, Jisoo you need to change but you haven't done any progress. You know that this will make you go on with other courses?»
Jisoo groaned and rolled her eyes «You don't need to make me do that. As soon as I'm done with this, permission or not I'll leave.»
«Why don't you make any effort to change? It's not bad behaving well.»
She shrugged and looked at Jihyo «Are you still mad? It's been a week..»
Jihyo ignored her.

It was true, it was a week since the two talked, Jihyo talked to her and took care of her for the two days after the mission then as soon as she was better she started ignoring her. I could see the hurt in Jisoo's eyes, she might have been a troublemaker and pretty much a child but she was still a human.

Jisoo looked at me and said plainly hiding her emotions who still didn't go unnoticed by me «I'm going out, we won't restart until tomorrow so, yeah.»
As soon as she went out, I approached Jihyo «Don't you think you're being too hard? All she did was care for you. She just wanted you to be safe, she put you before her.»
Jihyo turned to look at me «That's why I'm mad. She never NEVER put herself before the others. She's careless and not in a positive way. She doesn't care about herself Chaeyoung. She doesn't care if she dies. How can I not be mad at her!?»

So what I was thinking is true. I gotta do something about that! Or maybe... Yeah... Maybe I'll let Lisa deal with her...

«I understand you, but, you're hurting her Jihyo. You're her bestfriend, her sister, she needs you Park Jihyo. Think about this, not only she wants you safe for the reasons you already know, but because she would be probably lost without you. You're older than her so you always guided her and stayed by her side. You're the only point of reference she has. You're the only solid ground she has. She needs you more than you can imagine Jihyo. Think about this.» Jihyo looked at her phone lock screen which showed a picture of her and Jisoo and sighed «I'll go now, so you can think about what I told you. I have to look for Jisoo, after all now she's under my control. Think about it, okay?»

She didn't answer me but it was okay, I understood her, so I just went away trying to find Jisoo which wasn't really hard since she was literally sitting out of the room with her face in her knees. I kneeled down and layed a hand on her back «Are you okay?» I knew she wasn't, but it's good having someone asking you that «Have your heard our conversation?»
Jisoo looked at me, tears streaming down her face, it really hurts me cause except for the breakdown she had because of the almost raping experience, she never cried for someone
«Yes and yes... How do you know my... Thoughts about Jihyo?»
I smiled and told her «Let's go out to get some fresh air and we talk, okay?»
Jisoo sighed and nodded, standing up, we made our way outside in silence, Jisoo's cry was silent, so, so silent. As soon as we were out I followed Jisoo who was going towards the farthest and loner tree, she sat underneath it and I sat near her
«So,» I started «To answer your question, well, I just know it. You don't need to know how. What do you think about Jihyo's words?»
Jisoo dried her tears who didn't have any intention of stopping soon «It's n-not the first time I hear that... I'm just this way... Why can't she accept that? What is so wrong about putting others before yourself? What is wrong with me?»
I wrapped an arm around her in a comforting way, which she weirdly enough, didn't push away «There's nothing wrong with putting others before you, but you also need to take care of yourself, people who do that, should always also think about their wellbeing. There's also nothing, nothing wrong with you. Well except for your behavior that is very much wrong.» both chuckled and I went on «Jihyo accepts everything about you, all she wants is for you to also look at your health not focusing on others and abandoning yourself. You and her are basically sisters, how do you think she would feel if something bad happens to you or you die?»
Jisoo looked up «B-But, the grief would be felt by one person, one person is better than ten people... O-One person can be helped in moving on quickly, ten people would take longer. I don't see w-what's wrong in wanting t-the less damage as possible..»
«There's nothing wrong with it. The only wrong thing is you not caring about yourself.» I explained calmly
«BUT THIS IS THE WAY I AM!» Jisoo yelled
«You can change Jisoo. You surely did that at least once in the past, am I right?» Jisoo looked away and remained silent «Why not change again then? Maybe in a better way?»
Jisoo turned to look at me and said coldly «I've always been like this. I haven't changed. Understood?» she stood up and ran away, I sighed and stood up too, cleaning some dirt from my clothes.