His Girl Charlotte

15

It's been 2 days since Charlotte was last seen. I haven't slept, eaten, or stopped asking the detectives questions. We don't know anything yet. I walk into Charlottes room. She would argue with me and say it's not her room, but it is. It's decorated pink for her. The clothes belong to her. This is where she slept the passed month and a couple weeks. The room even smells like her now. Roses and soap. She smells so fresh all the god damn time and she's so fucking sweet. Why did I tell her to leave? I sit on the double bed, the silk pink sheets are cold. She didn't take anything with her when she went walking to wherever that night. I'm mad at her for being so unsafe, but I'm even more mad with myself for pushing her away like that. I feel like I'm living in a nightmare.

I even regret taking her phone away. She doesn't know where she "lost" it. She didn't lose it, I just was being a control freak and took it away.

I open the drawers to her nightstand. This is where I got the condom when we fucked that night... that was my favorite night. She doesn't know how pure and unforgettable she is. I've never slept with anyone like her. Her body, it's perfect. Her hair, her big brown eyes, her laugh. I feel my heart physically ache.

There's a little black book that I never noticed before. I grab it and open it. It's covered in writing on half of the pages. She journals?

August 22, 2018

I got the job at Maddox Enterprises today. Israel is a little mad, I don't know why. I really don't care though. I need a job and my boss is nice to me. He's really handsome, but he seems very... arrogant, I guess. His name is Michael.

I can't help my scoff. She thought I was arrogant? I skip a few pages to September 3.

Another day of living with Michael is good. I'm still not used to it, the luxury of everything... all the clothes he bought me... he has a maid and a bodyguard! Who has that? They are the sweetest people though. I love Janice. I'm even getting used to Michael. He doesn't intimidate me like he used too. He's helping me so much, I don't know why and I feel like I'm kind of a burden. He always tells me that it's not a problem that I'm staying here, basically on watch, but I still can't help but feel unwanted. I don't bring anything to the table. I'm just a girl who is hiding from her abusive ex boyfriend. I need to go to sleep though it's getting late. Goodnight.

September 14, 2018

I slept with Michael last night! I can't believe it. It felt wrong... he's my boss and all but I liked it at the same time. I was trying to fall asleep for hours and hours last night, but I couldn't. I was getting too in my head about Israel and him coming to find me. So I found Michaels room and he let me sleep with him. I'm not gonna lie, he gave me butterflies. He's just so nice to me. I had a terrible nightmare that I thought was real until he woke me up from it. He wrapped me in his arms for the night and I don't think I've ever slept better. I wish I could fall asleep in his arms every night. But he doesn't love me, I don't love him either though. I really like him but I know better.

How did I not know she felt this way? If I knew this then I would've stuck her in bed with me every night. I loved sleeping with her that night. She's so fucking cute, her head was nuzzled into my chest, she breathed so quietly and slow... she was so comfortable. Had I known she was having such a hard time sleeping alone...

September 21, 2019

I slept with Michael! Like actually, actually slept with Michael. I can't believe that happened. It was amazing though. He's so good in bed, he made me feel loved. I've never been with a guy that looked at me like that. The thought makes me wanna cry, but in a good way. I hope it was special for him too but it probably wasn't. He's been with so many girls, I know it. Especially Tonia who he just slept with last night. It makes me feel kinda dumb for letting him in like that. And I also kinda feel dumb that I have feelings for him. I don't want to call it love because I can't fall in love with him.

she ended it like that?

She does love me, doesn't she? Janice was right. How could I not know this? And that night was so special to me too, it was the best sleep I've ever had because I actually do care about her. I know I do. I always try to convince myself and everyone else that I don't but I definitely do. I love her.

"Michael, Stanley is here." Janice knocks on the bedroom door. She looks so tired. I know she is really mad with me, I don't blame her though. This is all my fault.

"Okay." I say. I take the black journal with me. When I see Stan, he has puffy eyes. He died his hair brown, I hardly recognize him. I set the journal on a side table and walk up to him, reaching my hand out.

"Hey." I greet him.

"Hi." He sighs. I can tell this has been a tough few days for him as well. "I don't know where to begin... I shouldn't of left her alone."

I shake my head, holding my hand up. "Please, it's my fault. I shouldn't of let her leave."

When he doesn't say anything I know he's agreeing with me. I'm such a piece of shit.

"The detective will be here in a few minutes. Sit anywhere." I tell him.

Stan sits at the couch and I sit across from him. He rubs his face in his hands.

"I have a question." He says, keeping his eyes on my shoes.

"Yes?"

"What started your argument... you know, the night she left... who was it that you didn't want her to meet?"

"Simon Doran." I mumble.

"Like... Simon Doran, the actor?" He looks at me in shock. I nod. "He's the sexual predator. Come on, you are friends with him?"

I shake my head. "Definitely not. He's friends with my best friend. And I don't have an issue with the guy but since I do care about Charlotte, and she was living with me, I know I should protect her. I mean, Charlotte.. she's... beautiful. Everything about her... he wouldn't of left her alone." I shake my head.

"You could of just told her that." Stan says to me.
He's right though, fuck.

"I regret everything I did that night."

"I wish I knew where she was." He says. Me too, Stan. Me too.

The elevator opens and in comes Detective Greg. He has on a black suit and a case.

"Stanley, your apartment got an unnerving package this morning." He tells us, we both stand up.

He opens his case, pulling out a bag.

"It's black hair. Charlottes black hair." He adds, passing us the bag.

"He cut her hair?" I ask. And he sent it to us? "What the fuck kind of game is Israel playing with us?" I nearly yell. Stan shakes his head. He looks terrified.

"Why would he send me this?"

"It's unclear. We are afraid of what else he might've already done to her." Greg says.

"He didn't cut all of her hair, this is only like 6 inches long. Charlotte has like 2 feet of hair on her head." Stanley says. He's right.

"So we contacted all of the US postal carriers in Portland. They are all currently checking their surveillance videos."

I need to punch something.

"So do we just fucking wait?" I spit.

Greg nods and Stanley sits down. He looks like he's just seen a ghost. All I can think about is Charlotte and hoping that she is okay.