Evo and Other Short Stories (Because I'm an idiot and lost the old account)

Bail Me Out!

Description: Mini has to go save Zee from Timmy and Martyn.

Mini was just coming back from a small exploration trip when he saw the signs in the front entrance of his cave. He started to run when he saw the first seven words. He stopped to read the entire proposition.

'Mini: we have Zee in the station. Give us a double chest full of diamonds and disband The Mafia, and we'll think about releasing him. -PP'

Mini was angered by this ridiculous demand. Zee was definitely worth that much, even if he'd joke and say he was only worth a stack of dirt, but there was no way he was paying those crooked cops, and disbanding The Mafia was definitely out of the question.

Mini went deeper into his cave to get his supplies.

He was going to solve this problem the best way he knew how.

When he got to the lever-infested station, Mini did something smart (surprisingly) and stood in the doorway to eavesdrop.

Martyn and Timmy were interrogating Zee.

"Alright, tell us what you know," Martyn shouted.

"No."

"Mate, we're not playing games. Tell us what you know." Timmy said in a calmer voice.

"No, The Mafia ain't given up nothing," Zee said.

"Double negative. That means you're going to give up something." Timmy shouted like an impatient 8-year-old who just learned what the word negative meant.

"Don't care, still not telling," Zee said just as maturely.

Timmy was about to continue the childish feedback loop when Martyn spoke up.

"Well if he's not going to answer to us," Martyn said in his normal voice, "I guess Terry'll just have to have a little talk with him." He finished in a deeper and smoother voice.

"Wait, who are you?" Zee asked a little concerned.

"I'm Terry the Tickler. Come here and let me tickle you." Martyn said in his Terry voice. 

Zee screeched a little as he backed away. Zee did not like being tickled, and there was someone with that action right in his name coming at him.

Mini, after deciding that his foes were distracted enough, burst into the building yelling like a madman, swinging his sword at Timmy. Martyn, after recovering from the shock, drew his sword to hit Mini away from his friend and yelled: "Get him!"

Once Mini was knocked down, Timmy drew his sword and stabbed downward. He swung at Mini, who scrambled to his feet and backed away with his sword drawn to block. This was Zee's chance. He put and pulled a lever by the door, sneaking past his captors into their storage room. Once inside, he went to a random chest, opened it, and saw it was a mess. Cursing Timmy and Martyn's lack of organizational skills, he quickly rummaged through the chest until he found a bow and some arrows. Zee took them and darted back up the stairs, through the central room, and to the back door.

Once outside, on the station's front porch, Zee could see things were not going so well for the Mafia. Mini could barely eat to heal up and make meaningful damage on neither Timmy no Martyn. Zee took an arrow, and, drawing it back to full strength, aimed at Martyn's head and fired, killing him instantly.

Timmy only had enough time to yell Martyn's name in surprise before Zee did the same to him, and Mini finished him off in one vicious sideswipe.

Once they were both gone, Zee jumped off his perch on the balcony railing and told Mini, "We have to go."

"Why, dude?" Mini asked.

Mini got his answer when he heard Martyn yell, "You won't get away from us that easily!"

Mini reluctantly ran with his friend, knowing they'll just respawn in their beds if he keeps killing them. The duo ran, only stopping on a far-off island when they were sure they weren't being followed anymore. They rested on a beach a bit before Zee spoke up.

"Hey, thanks for bailing me out, Mini."

"Think nothing of it." Mini replied, "You didn't do too bad yourself during that fight, Sissy."

"Aw, why thank yo- wait. What did you call me?" Zee said.

Mini put one arm around his shoulders and gave Zee a noogie "You're my little Sissy, and I'm glad to have my Sissy back." Mini told him affectionately.

Zee slipped out of Mini's grasp and ran off to the other side of the island. But his pout didn't last long, and the two of them essentially had a small celebration on that random island.