Deb's Wattys Acceptance Speech

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(Wattpad asks for an acceptance speech in the post-Watty's paperwork, and invites you to "have fun with it.")

First off, thanks to the bosses at Wattpad HQ for awarding Blackquest 40 a Watty.

Who would've thought Deb Bollinger, raised on the streets of San Francisco by a schizophrenic mom, would win a Watty? Not me. At first I thought "Watty" had to do with energy conservation, but I'm hearing otherwise. Bummer. Somebody asked if it was worth it -- if winning the award made up for being locked in my workplace for forty straight hours with no phone, no internet, totally cut off from the outside world.

That'll be a no.

Have you ever slept on a cot at the office with your slovenly (sorry, Jared) coworker's feet inches from your face? Or been hunted through HVAC ducts by foreign mercenaries? I thought not. So don't tell me I'm an ungrateful Wattys winner. It's basically an orange sticker, right? Versus what I endured, and the fact that I unwittingly did the bidding of one of the six most evil men on the planet. You do the math.

In conclusion: be safe. And kind.

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