Open Sores

Chapter 1: School is my playground when i'm not speaking of an issue

Please understand I have to leave and carry on my own life.

I don't belong here, I gotta move on dear escape from this afterlife.

'Cause this time I'm right to move on and on, far away from here.

Got nothing against you and surely I'll miss you.

This place full of peace and light, and I'd hoped you might,

Take me back inside, when the time is right.

Loved ones back home all crying 'cause they're already missing me.

I pray by the grace of God that there's somebody listening.

Give me a chance to be that person I wanna be.

(I am unbroken, I'm choking on this ecstasy.)

Oh Lord I'll try so hard but you gotta let go of me

(Unbreak me, unchain me, I need another chance to live.)

"Hey, Alyssa." Gavin said as he approached Alyssa. He noticed that she looked hurt and distant away from this place. Like she wasn't even on earth anymore. It was probably because she was listening to her Ipod again, he thought. "Hey." Alyssa smiled softly. "What's wrong?" Gavin asked curiously. He knew he shouldn't have asked because she probably wasn't going to answer, but he couldn't help himself, curiosity just got the best of him. "Everything." Alyssa muttered. Her voice showed sorrow and Gavin felt just...sad. "What?" Gavin asked pretending not to hear hoping she'd give him more detail. Gavin was one of the very few people that Alyssa had actually talked to but she still didn't say to much. "Nothing." Alyssa looked down at the ground as she continued to walk away leaving Gavin standing there confused.

Alyssa sat down alone at cookie break. Cookie break was a half hour long period in the middle of the school day where they could just relax and be alone much like Alyssa was doing now. Alyssa closed her eyes and say under the sun trying to think about happy thoughts. An Image of Gavin came to her mind. She felt like it was always easy to talk to Gavin and sometime she knew no matter what act she put on, he could tell when there was something seriously wrong. If he didn't think it was too serious he wouldn't bother and let Alyssa come to him. Earlier she wanted to tell Gavin everything that was happening. How her parents were drunk twenty four seven, how her father beats her everyday, and how she cuts herself to relieve the pain. But it was too hard to put it in words and she didn't even know how Gavin could help let alone react. Alyssa figured that he would be horrified but upset and filled with rage at the same time. It was just like Gavin, and that's one of the many things she loved about him. He was like the brother she never had. Trying to forget about Gavin and pouring out her feelings to him, she found the only other way she could think of. She sat on a brick ledge and pulled out her Ipod enjoying the warmth of the sun on her skin. Alyssa opened her backpack and pulled out one of her favorite books to read; A child called It. It was the only other thing that relaxed her as much as soft music and a tragic novel.

********

At lunch Alyssa sat alone, or so she hoped. A few minutes had passed when she looked up from her book and seen Gavin approaching her with a tray covered with a sandwich, an apple, and a small carton of milk. His shaggy black hair bounced slightly with ever step he took and his muscles seemed to flex just a little the tighter he gripped his tray. Gavin sat down and offered Alyssa a bit of his lunch but she just refused. Gavin chomped on his sandwich and Alyssa could of sworn that was the biggest bit she's every seen, he bit off half the sandwich. She just looked at him with her mouth hanging open in awe.

"So I'm not convinced." Gavin stated as he looked upwards at Alyssa. She looked straight into Gavin's eyes and noticed for the first time that there was one green and one blue one. "Your a husky." She said. "What are you talking about?" Gavin questioned not forgetting about the statement he made earlier. "Your eyes. And what's there not to be convinced about?" She replied. "You're not okay, just tell me what's wrong? I guess that's one way of putting it." Gavin said, the both of them having two conversations at once. "Well everyone has issues and I just happened to look like hell." Alyssa said a little irritated getting up to walk outside. Gavin got up and threw his tray in the garbage before following Alyssa outside.

"And what's that suppose to mean?" Gavin pushed. "Well there's two meanings. One meaning get the hell away from me and I don't want to talk about it," She continued not even glancing his way, "And the second meaning i'm a bit frustrated so I wouldn't get in my face if I were you." Alyssa sped up her walking pace trying to get away from Gavin. She knew that she was soon going to start going off about how horrible her life was and didn't want to cry in front of anyone, especially if that person was Gavin. "Look, I didn't mean to push it on you," Gavin said slurring his words a little lightly grabbing Alyssa's arm so she could stop and face him. "Ow." Alyssa jumped facing Gavin's way. It hurt for anyone or anything to even touch her in her arms because of her cutting, but she didn't want to stop. It was like alcohol, it took away the pain.

"Are you okay? I barely touched you." Gavin said softly noticing Alyssa's pain. His hand was still placed around her forearm loosened. "It's nothing," Alyssa whispered looking down trying to hide the tears. "Hey, Alyssa look at me." Alyssa refused and tried to pull away but Gavin wouldn't let her, every time she tried his arm was there restraining her or she would feel the pain. Gavin let out his arm and tilted Alyssa's face towards her. He seen her eyes filled with water and knew she was on the verge of tears but couldn't understand why. Gavin decided to let it go and figured that maybe she'd tell him when she's ready. "I'm sorry," Gavin said remorseful. He couldn't help but wonder why she was crying but he didn't want to push her even more. "It's fine," Alyssa muttered turning around and sprinting off in the opposite direction.