ѕυcĸ yoυ - jaeno/nomin

cнapтer ғorтy-ғoυr

[ cнapтer ғorтy-ғoυr ➛ ѕтarт ]

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Jaemin could get used to waking up next to Jeno.

After lazily telling each other "Good morning", they got out of bed and changed to feel 365 fresh.

While walking down the stairs to the empty kitchen — their mothers were out, how shocking — they went on random tangents, releasing crackhead thoughts to start their morning healthily.

"So when you live on an average street in some average country," Jaemin started, "and it's winter and God's nutting a lot, so the street side facing the sun never has to deal with driveway shoveling because the sun will just melt God's nut right off. However, the other side of the street ain't facing the sun ever — Donghyuck's ugly, who would wanna look at him all day, I'd rather watch Elmo porn — has a giant ass shadow over their driveway instead, so God's nut never melts! It's unfair, I call hacks and cheats, this is fatalitying my rights and freedoms 'cause those poor houses suffer from a sixty-nine-inch snow blanket all day every day."

"Stan Winner!" Jeno cheered. "Or Mamamoo. I could go on all day about both of the groups and their talented asses but I'll end up borderline psychotic fangirling or being aborted out of existence for mentioning topics that fans are so damn sensitive about. I love death but I don't wanna die yet 'cause I still have goals in life-- just kidding, I don't, I'm a mess and have been a disappointment my whole life bringing dishonor to my family and cow, I've given up on tryna live a fly-ass, bomb-ass, 10-out-of-10-would-suffer-through-again life."

Nodding sympathetically, Jaemin, just like Jeno so long ago the previous summer, popped blueberry Eggos into the toaster and placed spreads on the island.

The older set out cutlery and plates, and Jaemin stated, "Antis call us Koreaboos for stanning talent, when in reality, we're such strong, independent bitches for handling such a time-consuming, sanity-ingesting, brain cell-murdering, uwu-and-weave-snatching, life-swallowing activity."

"Hell yeah I do extreme sports," Jeno whooped along. "I finish homework when the teacher's collecting it, and I stan Kpop and manage cumbacks, shitty companies — when will Donghyuck set Cube's building on fire?! — annoying fans, confusing group structures, and memorizing names, faces, lyrics, and blood types."

"We're so talented," the pink-haired sighed, retrieving the toasted waffles so the two could begin eating their breakfast. "Archie Andrew's artistic, footballing, Veronica-fucking, Betty-bestie-zoning, fake-murdering ass couldn't compete."

Upon seeing Instagram loading on Jeno's phone screen, Jaemin's train of thought changed as he snatched the device and tapped to the older boy's account, screaming when he saw the following. "OH MY HUGE-DICK-- BABE-- 500K!!?! I'M DATING A REAL LIFE CELEBRITY, I'M DATING A GORGEOUS ASS ANGEL, LOOKS OF THE ASIAN GREEK GODS OH MY FUCKING FUCK JENO-- FUCK ME PROPERLY WITH A MINECRAFT DILDO I--"

Thanks to the brunette's modeling career, that he had put on pause for the past few weeks — he was surprised he hadn't been fired yet, considering the number of breaks and general absences he'd taken — perfect photographs provided a perfect feed and theme, showcasing gorgeous angles and beautiful backgrounds. His following had increased drastically too due to the popular brands and labels he modeled for and his memeful captions that sealed the deal.