MONTGOMERY (STARSHIPS TRILOGY, BOOK 1) ✔

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Working Things Out

2105, Day 18 || Third Quadrant Air Space

I don't like the feeling. The feeling of something about to happen. Something big. Something that can alter reality as we all know it. I don't know what it is. Or if what I'm feeling even has to do with something like this. I bring it up with Joshua. He brings me the Word. It clicks, but not so much. There is a lot I still need to learn and remember.

I've sent Naia and Jake, covert, to get some information and some maps of the Quadrants. Hunter, Bobby and the pastor, are resupplying the water and some other essentials. Lee and Nick are cleaning the engine. Literally taking it apart and looking at each part. I am not getting into it with them. It's just Jordan and me in the cabin.

"Why is it so hard for him to see why I do this?" I say; I'm talking about Jake. "We aren't going to go further if he doesn't see my side."

"Have you tried talking to him?" Jordan asks; his back is turned to me, so I'm not able to see his expression.

"We're barely dating, but yes. I've tried."

"But you don't want to give up because you feel something for him."

I sigh, "Yup."

"Told you."

"Don't start. I know. I stopped thinking and gave it a chance. But Jake is pushing buttons he shouldn't be pushing."

Jordan finally turns and faces me. He smirks and shakes his head.

"It's been that long since you had a boyfriend?" he asks, chuckling. "You don't need to know everything. Just go with the flow."

"I know," I reply, shrugging. "But with everything I've had bogging my brain, I wonder if he's really something I should let in right now. Or not."

"Well, my advice still stands. Talk to him. Express all this, to him."

I sigh, "You're easier to talk to."

"Jake needs to be someone easy to talk with, too. If he becomes your significant other, you can't come to me with your problems."

Ever the wise one.

"Okay, you're right. I'll work on it."

Jordan nods and turns around again. I don't like this. At all.

***

I pull Jake aside, after he and Naia get back. I break my rule. I let him into my room. But it's the only place we can talk without interruptions.

"You're scaring me," Jake says with a nervous chuckle. "You're not pulling out, are you?"

"No," I reply, shaking my head as I sit in my desk chair. "I just feel like we need to talk about some things. I feel like you don't get me. Not the way I want you to."

"Okay . . . What's up?"

"Do you ever wonder why I'm this way? Why I try to keep small distances between us? Or why I avoid kissing you?"

"Not really. I take what I can, I guess."

"That's it, right there. You take. I'm afraid to give you anymore because it might lead to you taking other things that I might not be ready to give you. I'm afraid of you getting mad later, because I won't let you get more physical. We're getting to know each other better, I know. But there are little gestures you do that make me want it more. I don't want to go too far, unless I'm ready for it. Which means, putting a ring on it."

I pause for a moment. Jake is actually taking in what I'm saying. I take a deep breath and keep going.

"I'm not saying I am expecting you to get on your knee," I go on, scooting my chair forward and taking Jake's hands into mine. "I'm just saying that I want to avoid us getting hurt more than we need. I'll consider letting you steal a kiss now and then, but anything more intimate is out of the question for now. Okay?"

At first, he doesn't say anything. Jake just stares at our hands. I'm holding my breath.

"Okay," he says, nodding as he turns his gaze up. "I can work with that. Does this mean you're going to let me label you?"

"Label me?" I cock an eyebrow and he chuckles.

"Do you want to be my girlfriend, Ryan?"

"I'd be honored. But I'm still your boss, got it?"

"You got it, boss."

I nod, and wait. Jake narrows his eyes. I roll mine. I'd better get this one started myself. I lean forward and gently touch my lips to Jake's. Once. Twice. When I move forward for a third, Jake catches on. His lips move against mine in a chaste kiss. And then he pulls away.

"We're in your room," he says, gently pushing my chair backward a foot. "I think you've broken your rule long enough."

I nod, "Thank you," I whisper.

Jake stands, pulling me with him.

***

2105, Day 20

Jake and I are walking around. There's this space hangar that was turned into a trading station for small business to sell their goods. There's artisan and food goods, people selling trinkets. It's really low-key, rustic and cozy. The only thing that sucks is not being able to breathe normal air.

"This might go good with that jacket you sport," Jake says, holding up a metal pin with black angel-like wings on it. "Even has your initials on the under side."

"No it doesn't," I say, taking it to have a closer look. But, sure enough, on the underside of the left wing are the letters C.R.T.

"Captain Ryan Taylor, or is it Conrad, Ryan Taylor?" I ask as Jake pins the trinket to the lapel of my jacket.

"Whichever," he replies, chuckling. "Point is, it's meant for you."

I almost tell him not to buy it, but when he puts the notes used as 3-Q currency I shut my mouth. If Jake wants to get it for me, that's his choice. I should let him do things for me, if he wants to.