Short (Dark) Stories

L.I.S.S. // Matthew's New Spot

I'm lost and fading, life ain't great...
My heart is breaking and life won't wait...

Step by step, a small child loses himself in the forest near his new home, with new people who actually love him. Still, he wandered far from those who cared to the safety of where he'd always found sanctuary and comfort, thinking about things no five-year-old should feel and listening to the sounds of red and orange leaves crunching and cracking and turning to dust under his tiny form.

He felt like a nuisance.

Big word for such a small kid, but he had heard it from one of the adults, the one who had found him in the hospital and later taken him away from his family and given him a new one. But, among six other children, its difficult to get a moment of comfort that lasted longer than a few seconds. And it wasn't his fault, either. At least not for the most part. Out of habit, Matthew did not like to be touched. He could only handle it for so long before fight-or-flight would kick in and force him to dart away and go do something else. But he also wasn't very active, so he didn't enjoy running around and playing games with the other children, regardless of how often they were willing to stop and invite him to join in. So here he was, alone as always, in his little nook in the forest.

No one there, no one around...
Not a soul and not a sound...

The area had been protected under promise a very long time ago so no more harm would come to it, so Matt wasn't worried about the large, gorgeous trees tipping over and landing on top of him when he leaned or layed against them. His height had nothing on the towering monsters he walked around on his way to the new spot he'd claimed as his own. The adults knew he was likely there if he wasn't at the house, so sometimes he wasn't comfortably storming off to there when he was feeling emotionally unsteady, but it also kept him from getting in trouble, because he still wouldn't speak to anyone and alert them to his location. As little Matthew came up on the area, his eyes directed themselves to the center of the safe point - a single fallen tree being held up by two other trees. A small smile spread across his pale, wind-whipped face at the sight of his little family of plants and he quickly switched to a run, his miniature legs hitting the ground hard so he could push off and keep sprinting towards the huge greenery. The grey fabric of his otherworldly sweatshirt caught on multiple places as the little boy with arms too small to manage, tried to hug the trunk of the fallen tree. He stood there for a short moment, as long as his hyperactive imagination would allow (there are spiders EVERYWHERE) and then ran around to the other two holding it up and gave them affectionate hugs as well. They all had names, the three of them, but Matt would never speak them again for anyone beyond the day he first saw them.
With a smile like a shining star, the child sat himself down in the sheltered space underneath the towering plants and shivered as a breeze ran through the same spot, making him grateful that he had come out with a warmer outfit than before, which had been thin pajamas in the middle of the night because he couldn't adjust to shorter days and didn't sleep very well anyhow. He sneezed into the wind, sending little particles of spit back towards him and making his face draw up in a cute disgusted expression. With the same hard frown, he rubbed his face clear of the icky feeling and sniffled to make it harder for that to happen again while he leaned back against the softer underside of the tree and waited for something interesting.

So fucking young, heartbroken, daydreaming, lost focus...

Nuisance. That's where his thoughts had been, and that's where they trailed back to, his subconscious laying on the guilt like a voice in the back of his head that whispered evil things into his mind. He practically lived in this spot, avoiding people and the comfort they brought because of his experiences. Were they annoyed they had to walk so far to come get him home again? Were they... angry?

A weary soul, no truth to find...
They were so lost, where's your goodbye?

Matthew hugged his legs close to his chest and placed his forehead on his knees, shuddering with each breath he took from pure anxiety. He'd been treated nicely here. Fed. Clothed. Taken care of. What if he had to go back to his other family because he was just too much?
His face paled and the shaking ceased for a moment as he rationalized things in the worst way.
It made sense. He was a young child, one with more than a few mental and emotional issues, why bother keeping him around when they had more to do already? Beyond emotional attachment, but like giving away a pet, they'd get over it. As far as anyone was concerned, he was replaceable.

The shaking returned, this time accompanied by stray tears that drifted down his cheeks slowly, as if they were reluctant to leave his face. His eyes went pink with emotion and his skin changed in little dots around his head as more unfortunate evidence of the salty tears dried before anyone found out. His sniffling became worse, breathing compromised by the crying. His lungs heaved heavily and irregularly due to the soft sobbing he tried to smother by hiding in his knees.

Your feet stuck in the sinking sand...
Your mind is reeling, shaky hands...
Tears are streaming, sorrow calls...
With no one there to break your fall...

Over the sound of himself struggling to breathe, it was nearly impossible to hear the sound of another pair of footsteps heading towards his little spot until the last second, when Matt started forcefully making the crying stop, digging into his legs with dull nails and shutting his eyes tightly, rubbing the tears off on his pants so he at least appeared to be okay. But he couldn't stop the wave of emotion stuck in his head, the panic in his thoughts, the fear in his mind. Ugly sobs racked his tiny form, making him shake like a leaf in the wind. The adult who was coming, someone impossibly nice and had been the only person to visit him when he was dying, noticed the little one's state and was by his side in an instant. Matthew was lifted from the cold ground and hugged, and he held onto the parent in order to keep from falling and hitting his head on one of the tree trio, though the sobbing didn't get better at all. If anything, having someone try to comfort him made the bawling worse because he'd spent the whole time in his thoughts thinking he was bothering them all by being alive. There was a hand in his hair, stroking, petting, and a voice in his ear, promising that everything was going to be alright. The child moved instead to hug the older male, squeezing him as tightly as his little muscles would allow and pressing his face into the other's shirt, staining it with tears as they flooded his eyes.

They were like this for a while while Matthew emptied his bucket of emotions and struggled to get his breathing to synchronize the way it was supposed to, almost like when he had been in the hospital, but it didn't stay that way for long as the comforting adult did a wonderful job of coaxing the calm back to the kid, letting him tire himself out emotionally and fall asleep in a warm embrace in the quiet woods. Carefully, he was carried back home and kept company as long as possible. He had a good dad.