The Music In Me (boyxboy)

4

I was permitted to go to the nearby church because our electricity was unavailable. It was a bit of a walk, so I had to go with Ryan, but it was very much worth the hike every single time. I needed music anyhow I could get it.

"So is it true that you and that one kid aren't friends anymore? I could've sworn y'all were getting along."

I looked at him for a second before focusing on where we were going. "What do you mean?" I pretended to be oblivious.

"Come on, Riley. How long are you gonna act like this stuff doesn't affect you?"

"I'm not acting," I mumbled. "What do you want from me, Ryan?"

"For you to open up to me, for crying out loud! Like, for once." He seemed frustrated as he splayed his fingers. "You're my brother; you don't need to blatantly lie to me all the time."

"If you think I'm always lying, then why bother to ask?"

He rolled his eyes. "Fine. Fine, I just won't care about how you feel if that's what you really want, apparently." I could sense his dry sarcasm and I folded my arms, wishing I'd gone with Ricky instead. He let out a bitter scoff. "You know, I actually do try to lift everyone's mood, not that anyone ever returns the favor. I like to laugh and be silly and... I may not be smart like Ricky or have this insane voice like you, but I dream to live a carefree, adventurous life one day. There's just too much sadness around me." He shrugged one shoulder and I glanced at him, not knowing what to say. "I... I don't wanna be like momma and papa," he whispered.

"We can't afford to have dreams," I said quietly. "That's what Nathan told me."

"I don't know what's more sad: the fact he ever uttered such nonsense or the fact that you believed him."

"Okay, but what if he's right? You don't see our lives changing, do you? No, it's just getting worse! Dad lost his job, Mom's too sick to work. We don't even have food. It's a surprise that the shelter we call home even receives electricity at all, but now it's out and nobody's paying for it any time soon. Which means we're going to be shivering tonight, and we don't even have better clothes to cover ourselves up. And if our school finds out; they're gonna call the police or something and take us away from our parents! We're stuck pretending everything is fine so that nobody catches on, but the illusion is clearly starting to crumble. So tell me, is Nathan really wrong?"

He shook his head in shock before cutting in front of me on the sidewalk, moving at a much quicker pace.

As I tried to catch up, he suddenly whirled around. "You know, for the record, you can actually grow up to be a happy and successful person, Riley. I can only wish I had your gift." He squeezed his eyes shut for emphasis. "You're beyond talented; you could dominate the music industry in ten or fifteen years if you set your mind to do just that." Gazing at me, he sighed. "Why would you ever let someone belittle your passion?"

I blinked at him, letting his words stick to me. My heart practically swelled at the thought of one day making my own music. I didn't care much for the fame but... I wanted to be surrounded by nothing but harmonies and melodies, perfecting my craft and skill, growing as an artist.

"I would love to be in the music industry," I admitted.

"Yes. Exactly!" He placed his hands on my shoulders while nodding in encouragement. "Dream about it day and night until you get there."

"You know, I wanna try writing my own song. I might be good at it, you know?"

He smiled. "You should. Please do. We'd all love to hear it, okay?"

I drew in a breath and steadily nodded, making up my mind to do so. We continued down the path all the way to the church and walked through the familiar, large wooden doors with artistic stained glass on it.