In His Arms (HIATUS)

nineteen...

Mary with an assistance from other maids cleared the broken things and replaced those that were meant to be replaced.
I sat in a daze watching and touching my head because what I needed was something to heal the headache.
The cottage was soon surrounded in silence and I did not have any interest in moving.
When insisting knocking jarred my state and Mary opened to a heaving Clarissa who walked to her and taking her hands. "come with me. I don't know what words Mr. Thornwicke shared with my husband but we are leaving. Come home with me."
And words died in my throat as I studied her. I was ready to take her hand and go. Perhaps begin a new life but then I saw movement from the corner of my eyes and my heart fell into panic. I do not know why but it was not the fear that i saw in Lottie's eyes. He would never do any wrong to me but the thought of leaving and new hope flooded me but if i were to look thoughtfully. I was already ruined and before i thought i had no where to go but his arms but then again what i was doing here. in his estate was the reason i was not instantly grabbing her hands.
He stood at the door, imposing, frightening.
I took her hand. "its best you don't associate with me. My ...current status will destroy you."
"no. Women have recovered from such history and no ones knows of your relationship with him."

"I was not in a nunnery Clarissa when he chose me."
Confusion clouded her eyes as she stared at me. she did have a lovely shade of brown eyes.
"i made wrong choices during my time alone and i became a woman who services men."
She stared at me puzzled and i saw realization come to her making her step back as if I burned her. My throat clogged. Clearing my throat. "its best you do not acquaint yourself with me. Mary escort Lady Hay to the main house."
Clarissa stumbled back and stopped short when she saw him and fear filled her before she turned looking back at me and walked out.
Shaking Clarissa turned to look back at cottage and for some reason the beautiful sight resembled a cage at that moment her eyes met Mr. Thornwickes as he watched her as well and chill ran up her spine. His gaze was not friendly. He was warning her.
"its best you look away. Your sister is safe." Clarissa heard Haley's maid speak before she turned walking away.
"is she really?"
"yes."

I focused on the door that closed and he turned to me.
Watching "you have been busy."
"it might seem so but no."
"come with me." he then walked out of the cottage and panic set in. Had he forgotten there were guests? but from what i realized. He truly did not care and at this moment. He did not plan to care if people saw them together.
"Mr. Thornwicke...".
"you follow me when I say so." was his direct answer walking towards the door about to step out and words flew out of my mouth.
"and If i do not."
He stopped and he never turned. Yet I felt his dare. A cold warning like wind blew into the air and i realized i was trembling.
He was daring me by walking further out of the door and
I stood up trembling as I reached for the door and heart racing so fast. I closed the door as i backed away from it.
He should learn not to dare me. He was asking me to take a gamble. He was asking me to take a risk.

He did not turn to know whether to confirm whether she would follow him. He walked and met her maid heading back.
"gather her belongings and place her across me."
As he continued to walk on and Mary walked hurriedly into the cottage and found the miss was in chamber, standing motionless.
"he has asked me to move you to the estate."
I felt blood draining from my face.
"there are still guests." i argued but who was i arguing with. He had made his choice.
Gathering my skirts and did the only thing I could think of. I hightailed of the cottage and running to the front of the estate. Desperately praying.
When a carriage that was driving past came to a halt and the door opened. There was Clarissa inside looking down at me and i saw the questions in her eyes. There was no going back. My answer was wordlessly entering the carriage.
It would only be temporary. I think.

Mary was left pale pacing back and forth.
She understood her miss.
But did she know she was poking at a bear?