Just Survive Somehow

Chapter 17 - Not Here

The following days were awkward and strange. Catarina avoided Ahren, Ahren avoided me, and I avoided Catarina. It felt like we were stuck in a silent Mexican standoff.

I kept busy with whatever I could, I took to training Jasper on how to use a gun and trained Allie in first aid. Jasper and I would do a walk every day from our subway station to the next one over and would check to see if any of the dead had begun collecting above ground.

We were about halfway through our walk when he decided to break the silence that had engulfed us.

"Are you okay?"

I'd been awful quiet while we walked and he must have picked up on it.

"Is this about Ahren and Catarina?" He asked.

I nodded. "Ahren told me something, I've been avoiding Catarina since."

Jasper just nodded back.

"You're not gonna ask what it was?" I asked him.

He shrugged. "If you want to tell me you can, but if you don't, I understand."

What was I thinking? Why would he care what was going on between them? Although, he might care after he hears what I have to say...

"After I heard Ahren break up with Cat, I questioned him about it. He told me exactly why he had to cut it off and I agree with him." I hesitated to tell Jasper the rest. My hesitation had not to do with trusting Jasper, but with trusting his instincts.

"Ahren kissed Allie."

Jasper didn't say anything. Instead he just continued walking.

"Jasper?"

"What?"

"Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Cause she's your little sister."

He sighed.

I hoped he could tell that I understood his reasons for being upset.

"Why does it even matter anymore? There are much bigger things we have to worry about." Jasper said.

"It matters because it's who we are, we can't just leave all that behind."

He nodded. "Do you trust Ahren?"

The question should have been a simple yes or no. Had he asked me when this first started, I would have pounded the question with a hard yes. After all, he was the person Cat and I trusted to lead us when we first heard what was happening. However, one person can only take you so far. Did I still trust Ahren? Yes. Of course I trusted him. Yes, he had broken up with Cat but that was better than pretending he was still in love with her.

"I trust him."

Jasper nodded again. "And I trust my sister."

"So why are you avoiding Cat?" Jasper asked, moving the subject off of Ahren and Allie.

It was my turn to sigh. "Among a few other things, she doesn't know about Ahren and Allie and I really don't want to have to tell her."

"Ah, the bearer of bad news."

I nodded. "Exactly."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know..."

I didn't know what I was going to do... Ahren and Allie would have to become public with everyone eventually. Cat would have to find out eventually. Would it be best coming from me? Or coming from Ahren?