better off.

martin

millie's pov

i cried that night, i cried a lot. i was pretty shaken up over what i witnessed. i had only ever seen that stuff happen in movies, but to watch it play out in real life is terrifying. i haven't told anyone and i don't plan on doing so. the boy threatened me, and well, i'm not taking any risks.

although what happened was traumatising and something that i want to forget completely, it is stuck in my head. it is always there, the boy hitting, kicking and beating the lifeless figure on the ground.

i can't help but think about that boy, the boy whom i did not know the name of. despite the fact he is a vile human. he is always in the back of my mind, and i don't want him to be. but i am intrigued by him, interested. i want to know why he killed someone. i had many unanswered questions for him, that someday will hopefully be answered.

-

i slip on a white crop top with my denim skirt and converse before walking outside to meet sadie and noah. the warm, morning air greets me which puts a smile on my face. i hate winter.

"millie!" noah practically shrieks from sadie's fiat causing me to shush him since it was 8am and most of my neighbours were sleeping.

"do you want to wake up the whole neighbourhood?!" i whisper with raised eyebrows as i climb into the back of sadie's car.

"whatever, tell us then! how did the date go!" noah asks excitedly.

"well, uh, romeo kind of asked me to be his girlfriend" i say nervously, worried to see my friends reactions .

both of their faces light up immediately, then they look at eachother and scream in excitement.

"guys, shut up, please" i groan as my best friends continue to freak out at my new relationship. i swear they care more about my love life than their own. "it's not a big deal" i add.

"uh, are you stupid" sadie sniggers at me before driving down the road as some ariana grande song played quietly in the background, sadie was obsessed with her.

"millie, he is your first boyfriend, it's a big deal" noah exclaims as he turns around to face me. noah is gay, and he doesn't have the confidence to get to know any guys, me and sadie always try to convince him to. so instead, he turns all his interest to my love life.

"so?" i say simply as i roll my eyes. this causes noah to shake his head at me, like a disappointed parent to a child.

"i swear to god millie" noah groans before turning back to face the road in front of him, sulking as he folds his arms.

-

finn's pov

"what did you just fucking say?" my father yells at me as his face turns red in anger.

"someone saw me kill him" i mumble, ashamed of myself for letting something like that happen.

he didn't shout at me, he didn't curse at me, instead he threw a powerful punch at the side of my face. this caused me to groan in pain as i face down to the old wooden floor and hold my face.

"you are a fucking disgrace of a son" he growls as he opens yet another bottle of beer and slouches on the couch.

"what is martin going to say" i finally manage to ask to my drunken father.

"well, we will have to see. you fucked up son, so i wouldn't be too excited if i was you" he says with a smirk. "and i don't think he will be saying much" he laughs.

how fucked up can a father get? he puts the gang before his own son. martin is the leader of the gang, and to be completely honest, i am not scared of him whatsoever. he is a pathetic and weak man, he can't do anything, he has a group of people who bow down to him like he is some form of a fucking god.

i don't want to be in a gang, i really don't. it is slowly ruining my life. i am only in it since i am forced to be by my father. i have killed people for this gang, too many people. the gang has turned me into a cold, bitter person. my mum left my dad because of the gang, i have had to move schools 5 times. and tomorrow is my 6th school, i have had to move again.

i am not looking forward to this one either, it is full of upper class snobs who think they are fucking better than everyone else. i luckily have 2 of my friends there, so i won't be completely alone, thankfully.

the gang is my biggest secret, and i don't tell anyone about it. all i do is try to make my dad proud, which at times almost seems impossible.

for the past few weeks he has actually been calm with me, shown that he is somewhat proud. that's until some little british shit came along and decided to fuck everything up.

why did she not just keep walking? why did she have to watch? she has ruined everything between me and my dad, and who knows what martin is going to do to me. no one will help or protect me from him, not even my own dad. i feel alone in this world, and it fucking feels like shit.

honestly if my punishment from martin was to be killed, i would be thankful right now.

i don't want to be here anymore.