What Was Lost // (Harry Styles FanFic)

Chapter 15

Lilly's POV

    Have you ever experienced a moment when you literally felt something inside of you, or in your life, shift? Something inside you changes, and it happens so suddenly that you don't even realize it at first?

     Sex with Sutter was like that. Something in our relationship and ourselves, shifted.

    We were already a lot closer than your normal teenage couple. But after we had sex for the first time, it was even more intense. And I'm really not sure why, I just think after you share such an intimate and vulnerable moment with someone, it makes you trust each other even more than you did before.

     It also makes you more possessive though, because the thought of them sharing that act of love with someone else, literally drives you crazy.

     And because of Ashley Moore, I was about ready to be committed to some crazy house, or ward.

     It was like every time I wasn't with Sutter at school, she was there. I would be walking into the cafeteria and would look over at our table where we sit, and she would be occupying the seat next to him. Or I'd walk down the hallway to meet him in between classes, and she would be walking beside him, just looking up at him. Not to mention they had three classes together, and he and I only shared one.

     It was of course the one they didn't have together.

    I told Sutter repeatedly that I didn't like them spending so much time together, that she had ill intentions towards him and it made me feel uncomfortable. To his defense, I never noticed him reciprocating any of those behaviors, and half the time he wasn't even paying attention to her but instead looking for me.

     I told him I wanted him to tell her to go away, to leave him alone, but Sutter never had it in him to be mean to people like that. He once asked me why I never said something to her, and I told him because I didn't want everyone thinking I was some crazy, controlling girlfriend.

     His response?

    "So you want me to be the one to be an ass, and the only one who knows you're a crazy, controlling girlfriend instead?"

     His smartass got punched for that one.
    
    I had brought it up again last night, before we parted ways into our houses, for the couple of hours until he was sneaking into my window.

     "I just really wish you would say something to her. Tell her you have a girlfriend and that' there's no point in flirting with you because nothing is going to happen between y'all."

    He rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed with how much I kept talking about this lately. "I don't need to tell her I have a girlfriend, she knows. The whole school knows."

     "So that's makes it okay? No! If anything it makes it worse that she knows we're together and doesn't have enough respect for our relationship to back the hell off."

    "Lilly, I don't know what to tell you. I'm not saying anything to her because I know there's no point, the girls gonna do whatever she wants to do. You say something if you want to. But there's no reason because no one is going to take me away from you. Even if you are psychotic now."

     He meant it as a joke, and even laughed a little to make it obvious. But it wasn't funny to me, because he didn't realize how insecure I felt about this.

     Ashley was this spunky, beautiful, cheerleader. And she knew how to talk to boys and get what she wanted. I was blonde, athletic like the boys, and loved to read. I realized I wasn't bad looking, but I didn't look as good as Ashley either.