Partners in Crime

Chapter 20 - Let's have a chat

*Erin's P.O.V*

"Jay, what's up. You have been very quiet since we left the precinct" I asked, placing my hands over his, very quickly gaining his full attention.

"There's something I want to talk to you about but I'm not sure how to say it" Jay said, staring down at his hands.

"Are you breaking up with me?" I asked, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill. Jay's eyes shot up and a look of shock crossed his face.

"Good heavens no!" he burst out, almost as if he could not believe that I would think he would ever break up with me. "You are the best thing that ever happened to me, so you aren't getting rid of me that easily" he continued, looking into my eyes with sincerity.

"Well that's good. I do not want to get rid of you. I'm kind of fond of you" I teased, smirking at him, and making him chuckle.

"Only kind of?" he asks, feigning hurt.

"Yes, only a little bit" I joked, moving to sit on his lap, my legs on either side of his. "Now what did you want to talk to me about?" I asked, wrapping my arms loosely around his neck.

"Both myself and the rest of the unit are a bit concerned about you and we think it would be a good idea for you to speak to someone about what happened. We are all more than happy for it to be one of us if that is what you would like. If not, there is always the option of speaking to a psychologist" he said, keeping his arms securely around my waist.

"I don't want to speak to a psychologist!" I exclaimed.

"Ok that's fair enough" Jay said, rubbing small circles in my lower back, "We are all here for you when you are ready to talk" he continued, pulling me in closer to his chest as I started to cry.

*Jay's P.O.V*

I pulled Erin close to my chest and rubbed her back as she continued to cry into my shoulder. My heart broke seeing her so upset. Whatever had happened to her during those five months she was missing must have been horrific if it caused her to cry so quickly. In that moment, I wanted nothing more than to take away her pain.

We stayed like that for a long time and I wondered how much longer it would last as my back was starting to seize up, not that I would ever admit that to Erin. I would hold her for as long as she needed me to.

After another five minutes she pulled back slightly and wiped the last few tears from her eyes.

"Can we just cuddle in bed? It's been a long day" she asked, resting her forehead against mine.

"Of course," I said, standing up with her still securely wrapped in my arms. She wrapped her legs around my waist and I carried her into our bedroom.

I lay her down on the bed gently before crawling in beside her and wrapping my arms around her. I kissed the top of her head before shutting my eyes and slipping into a peaceful slumber.

*The next morning*

*Erin's P.O.V*

I lay awake for hours watching as Jay's chest rose and fell with each breath he took. I traced small circles on his bare chest with my fingers. No matter how hard I tried, sleep eluded me once again.

I watched as the rising sun peeked in through the blinds, illuminating Jay's chiselled features.

I had not been fair to him these past two months. He has been so supportive and understanding and I have done whatever I could to keep him at arm's length. Maybe it would not be so bad if I let him in and told him what happened during those five months I spent trapped in that dingy room. He was the only one I trusted not to judge me for being weak. Eventually I would have to speak to someone, keeping it to myself was eating me up inside. I could not keep disturbing Jay's sleep during the night because of my nightmares. Fatigue is dangerous in our line of work.