If I Could Fly

Happy Birthday

I have never in my life felt so relived to be in a room with only Liam and Freddie (or more specifically a room that does not contain Harry Styles).

I practically run back to the room, and shut the door behind me so quickly that it makes a loud bang. Liam looks up at me then, confusion written all over his face.

"Are you ok mate?" He asks

"Yep. Fine. Just fine thanks." I reply, not wanting to get into it when Freddie is right there, but Liam looks at me for a second, sending me an expression that I can only translate to the 'we'll talk later face'.

"Can we head back out now though, there's a Starbucks just by the entrance and I'm a bit peckish" I ask Liam, anxious to get out of here. Liam stares at me again, before hesitantly agreeing.

"Yep, sure, just meet me by the bottom of the stairs about ten minutes before the doors open, and I'll make sure you get into the arena alright. I have some ear defenders for Freddie as well, he'll need them when it gets loud." Liam explains, though he still looks hesitant.

"Sure, thanks for that, it's much appreciated. Come on then little one, let's go get you a hot chocolate"

We file out, Liam leading the way back through the maze of hallways and doors. I breathe out a sigh of release when we make it back to the entrance in one piece, without being spotted or stopped.

The area is much busier now, but the queues aren't too long yet so Freddie and I hurry over after saying another quick 'thank you' to Liam.

We grab our drinks, and a cupcake to share, and spend the rest of our time waiting in the Starbucks.

~~~

"It's nearly starting Daddy! Can you believe it?" Freddie shouts up at me from his perch on the metal barrier.

I'm stood behind him, making sure he doesn't injure himself before the concert even starts. My stomach swoops at the fact that it nearly time, but I put on a brave face. I can do this, for Freddie.

"No I can't, we're so close to the stage!" I reply, feeling another swoop of nerves about our proximity to the stage.
I could literally touch the stage if I wanted to and that scares the crap out of me.

There is absolutely nowhere to hide, I just have to pray that he doesn't look in my direction.

Freddie makes that kind of hard though, with his massive 'IM SIX' badge pinned to his lapel. We stand out from miles away.

I'm pulled from my thoughts though as the lights dim and the sound of screaming fills the air. I pull Freddie's ear defenders down over his little ears and hug him tightly, worried that it's too loud, but he's not bothered at all, and screams loudly with the rest of the crowd.

The first half of the concert goes without a hitch and Freddie loves every second of it. Harry, much to my relief, stays mostly on the right side of the stage and doesn't come very close to us on the left.

Harry is about to go into his first mid-concert speech though and that's what makes me nervous. I've seen many videos of him talking to kids in the crowds, he never seems to get through a concert without saying hi to one of them, and it wouldn't half surprise me, knowing my luck, if he'd picked up on Freddie's birthday without me even noticing.

"How're we doing Doncaster?" Harry asks to which Freddie shouts
"Gooooood!!!"

"Are we having a good time?"

"YEAH!" Freddie screams, pumping his fists into the air to emphasise how much fun he's having.
"ITS MY BIRTHDAY HARRY LOOK! LOOK! IM SIX!" He shouts, very loudly is I say so myself, so loudly that Harry hears him and starts walking over in our direction, searching the crowd for the little boy that caught his attention.

When Harry's eyes come to rest on Freddie he grins. My heart literally flips in my chest. He hasn't seen me yet.

"Ah, I see its your birthday, is that correct?" Harry asks

"Yep! This was my special birthday present and I wanted to wear my special badge because I'm six now! I'm a big boy!" He shouts

"Wow! Six is an exciting age." Harry replies into the mic. My heart pounds. I beg that he doesn't look up at me.

"Yep. I'm all big now. My Daddy says I can have big boy stuff in my room now, we'll, except for my Binkey and my blanket."

Harry's eyes flicker upwards to me and they meet mine.

I'm dead. So dead. I see him hesitate for a second, and my heart stops, fearing the worst. Oh my God, please don't recognise me. Please.

I see no recognition in his eyes though, his face is unreadable and I think I might die, and then he opens his mouth, but he doesn't tell me to leave like I thought he would. He simply asks

"Ah, is that so?" And I my brain stalls for a second, and the only way I can think to reply is to nod my head, and then loom down at Freddie. Anything to get his eyes off me.

"Shall we sing happy birthday to my new little friend then? What's your name?" Harry asks, looking at Freddie once again.

My heart swoops and my stomach churns with abundance's if questions. It's done now though, I reassure myself. Surely the worst is done.

"Freddie!" My son shouts, shocking me from my thoughts. Then the chords to Happy Birthday begin and I hoist him up into my shoulders as the crowd sings.

And to think they're lead by Harry Styles none the less.