ALiVE (KHR Fanfic)

124. Decision

"If you wanna try and kill yourself again, go the fuck ahead," Squalo told me. His words were covered in spite and naught of emotion. "If you want to join us, claw you bloody way up like the shitty zombie you are, and maybe we'll consider!"

His words were hurtful, but the tears I spilled then were undeniably of joy.

-

Today, I spent time with my younger sister, Sui.

We talked longer than we have before. Today, she seemed to feel like telling me more about her days. She had been spending time with Irie more often, it seemed. She staved off from the topic of the distant future-- of what she was going to do when the Vongola left Japan-- so I didn't bring it up either.

She pushed me around on my wheelchair, and we took a short tour around the hospital as we talked in our own form of privacy. It was nice to just spend time with each other, even if the dialogue was strained.

"Rei-chan, you look better than you did last week. Did something good happen?"

I jumped at that, a blush rising to my face. 

"What, did Takeshi-nii propose or something?" Sui teased.

"Sui!" I snapped back in embarrassment, "It's not that, geez!"

Sui giggled, "yes, yes, I was just joking, of course. We all know Takeshi-nii's the oblivious nut here."

"Huh?"

"Sorry, both of you are oblivious nuts," Sui corrected.

"You're getting real cheeky, aren't you?" I clenched an annoyed fist at her.

It was refreshing, in all honesty. It was the light and happy atmosphere I couldn't get with people who were affiliated with the Mafia.

They've been unable to make time for visits-- Kyoko with Amano-sensei, helping out with the pharmaceutics on a trial basis; and Haru, who pursued a higher education, aiming to skip grades and perhaps graduate before Tsuna so she can begin secretarial work in the CEDEF, I've heard.

"Oho, a familiar face!"

I looked up-- and my mouth hung agape.

His head of hair was a little messy, but still soft and white. He was clutching nearly seven plastic bags of foodstuff; and the blue-haired girl beside him wasn't carrying any less.

"Byakuran!" I called, "and Bluebell!"

 "It's Byakuran-sama!" Bluebell snapped back almost instantly.

At that, Byakuran laughed with me, and outside in the garden, we settled by a bench to talk. I took a can of coffee, and the two marshmallow hoarders took cans of hot chocolate.

"This is our first time meeting in this world, isn't it?" Byakuran faced me, putting down his pack of marshmallows out of politeness, "Ninomiya Rei-kun?"

I nodded, "it is."

Byakuran glanced at Sui, who smiled back nervously, as if she was really unsure of how she should respond-- 

"Come to think of it, Sui, your boss in the Future was Byakuran, wasn't it?" I wondered out loud, "so are the both of you vaguely acquainted or something?"

Sui nodded hesitantly.

Byakuran simpered, "Not too much, though! I just knew her as Shou-chan's girlfr-"

"Woahh," Bluebell had somehow emerged right beside Sui. She was six in this frame of time, so she was very much shorter than Sui, "that pin is so cool!"

Bluebell was sparkling, glancing at a black, goat-insignia hair emblem at Sui's fringe.

Sui blushed, "Th-Thanks," she whispered, "Shou...Shou-chan gave it to me..."

"It's so cute!" Bluebell fawned, "I want one too!"

"If-" Sui seemed nervous, but excited now, "If you don't mind another design-- I have another one I can give you," she was eager. 

"Really?" Bluebell was so happy.

Byakuran swallowed a marshmallow, "now that I think about it, Bluebell doesn't have any girl friends," he pointed out, "except Yuni-chan."

I chuckle, "Sui's not often a big sister either, so this is very assuring."

The two girls were now engaged in a quirk and cute yet unendingly heated conversation. Sui picked out the hair pin from her pouch, and they were helping each other put it on.

Byakuran and I gave a synchronous sigh.

It was chilly now, under the gentle shade of autumn-- very, very calming. A breeze blew through me, the oxygen fresh with the scent of wilted greenery. 

We shared a conversation-- we talk about the Future that was now past; of the Future neither of us could see; and of the Past that would henceforth be forgotten.

We came to an understanding; found new understandings; and uprooted past misunderstandings to bury them in better, more conclusive soil.

We clanked our cans together, and drowned the rest of our drinks.

"Hey, Byakuran," I spoke up, handing him my can so he could throw it, "could I ask your help in contacting someone?"

"Contacting someone?" Byakuran asked, a simper crawling up his face, "since you're asking me, I assume it has to do with Parallel Worlds?"

Sui and Bluebell were a little further off, having gone to secure more marshmallows.

I nodded, "could you?"

Byakuran sat down beside me, "Hmm, that would depend on who is it," he said opening a new packet of marshmallows and popping one into his mouth, "in my parallels, I only looked for those that were useful, after all."

"In that case, I'm quite confident you know the method of contacting these people," I chuckle.

"Hehh," Byakuran hummed, amused, "who? For your information, that... Russo, was that his name? That guy didn't exist in other parallel worlds, like you, so I can't find him."

I sucked in my dry laughter.

"No worries," I assured, "it's not him. I-- I don't think I'll ever be able to meet him again, anyways. His soul has passed-- like the soul of the girl who was once in me. I'm confident it won't come back this way anytime again."

They've gone. I don't know and won't ever know where their souls ended up-- "but that all goes on a different tangent now, Byakuran. I'm fine with never meeting him again."

Byakuran stopped eating for a moment, and turned to me in consideration.

"Then," he said meaningfully, "who exactly are you looking for?"

I clenched my fist-- and reminded myself of my resolve. Squalo told me to crawl back up to the field they stand. Like the zombie I am.

I'm no longer an undead, I reminded myself, I'm not like Russo.

"I don't know the guy's name," I admitted bashfully, "but I know how I can get closer to that guy, and with that I need your help to contact the one that can link me to him." 

Byakuran chortled, "with how roundabout you're being, I have a feeling I'm not gonna like this. Awesome, what's this person's name?"

"Bermuda von Veckenschtein," I said simply.

"Excuse me, what?"