iris . vkook

thirty nine

"Not fair!" The young boy suddenly stamped his foot, "Jeon is mine!"

"And mine!" The girl retorted, both of the kids' tiny arms folded into a cross that I can only assume was supposed to be intimidating.

"Jeongguk can be both yours and Taehyung's. It's a different type of love, so it's allowed." She smiled at the two protesting youngsters.

Jeongguk smiled at the children, "anyway. 'Ma, would you look after my flowers, please?"

She nodded, "don't I always?"

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After saying farewell to the old woman, and hugging the two tearful children, me and Jeongguk were ready to set off back to Seoul.

"Seatbelt, petal." He reminded as he leaned over his seat, looking for something.

Smiling to myself, I clicked the metal piece into the holder, watching smugly as Jeongguk's shirt continued to rise with each stretch of his arm.

"Kim, I can literally feel your eyes on my stomach." He addressed me by my last name, causing me to laugh.

"You're practically putting a show on for me."

He snorted, retrieving the CD case he was looking for, "when did my little petal become so perverted?"

"I was always this way." I frowned.

"Uh huh, and Jimin was always tall."

I stared at him for a few seconds, trying to be mad at him but just ending up laughing at his shitty insult towards Jimin.

He smiled, putting the CD into the player, looking through the side mirror as he reversed, spinning his hands on the wheel before accelerating, BIGBANG's Taeyang's voice ringing through our ears, the sound of fast winds harmonising beautifully.

As Jeongguk began to softly sing to the song that was playing, starting off nicely before yelling the lyrics as he sped down the roads, I couldn't help but think of my previous conversation with Taeyong when I'd seen him in the shop.

--------------flashback-----------------

"That's why Jeongguk was so frightened of Jisom. He was afraid that he'd turn out the same way as Jung-hyun." Jungwoo spoke sadly, Taeyong nodding.

"Please be careful with him. I know that you won't hurt him on purpose. But, please, please listen to me. Don't pester him to tell you about Jisom. He won't react well. At all. Just be careful, yeah?" Taeyong said, "he's delicately fragile. We've only just got the old Jeongguk back, make sure it stays that way, we're pleading you."

"Of course, I promise."

-----------------flashback over------------

Delicately fragile.

Fragile.

A crucial example of not judging a book by its cover.

Jeongguk wouldn't appear fragile at first glance.

In the slightest.

He appears cool and collected, and maybe slightly (very) badass. He seems fearless, protective and courageous.

Never in a million years would I have thought that Jeon Jeongguk was fragile.

Someone who kills people with bare hands. Someone who rips apart families and breaks hearts, with his very own palms. 

But when I saw how his face changed after the little girl mentioned Jisom, and how every single muscle in his body stiffened, eyes tearing up and mind becoming panicky, it began to make sense.

He still feared this 'Jisom'.

Someone who no longer had any form of control over him, someone who doesn't associate with him anymore, someone who isn't in his life.

Jeongguk was emotionally controlled by Jisom.

Whatever Jisom had done in the past, still affected Jeongguk internally now. 

Seeing news stories about women and men being domestically abused, it caused Jeongguk's hands to become fidgety and he'd anxiously look around, as if he was waiting for someone to appear, for something to happen.

I'd noticed that Jeongguk hadn't appeared at school for a week when Miss mentioned in art that the new topic would be on abuse and how we had to capture emotions, to show that it was something that everyone could sadly experience.

He'd never handed that piece in, though I hadn't questioned it at the time because Miss had let it go, she didn't question it either.