Furqat (MaNan FF)

Manik's Life After Eight Years

I stared at the water down as my legs swayed lightly in it. I gulped some amount of beer into my throat and looked down again.

It has been 8 years, 8 years to that dreadful day. That day still haunts me. Still gives me the chills whenever I think of it.

That day, they wanted me to choose. Choose between them and her. I was confused. Whom should I choose? I cannot choose. And that too between them and her.

One was my family and another one was my life. My love.

I sighed remembering the day we spent together just before that dreadful day. We made love, we were happy and we thought everything was back to normal. Fab 5, us and album too.

But the very next day big fiasco happened. And the same accusations, same hurtful words, and same her. Crying. Looking down.

I was choking by the time they told me to choose. I couldn't choose and then she... she walked towards me and chose them for me.

She knew I loved them. But she forgot that I loved her too. She knew that I was only one to protect them, but she forgot that she was the only one to protect me. She knew that I was the light for them in the darkness of this life but she forgot that she was the only star who shine for me.

And that day I couldn't even stop her. And I still regret it.

The very next day, we had to leave India for our album. I came here with fab 5 and Navya, because Cabir had proposed her marriage just one day before. Even before I go to meet her, they wanted me to be with them. I knew I will come back and in that span of time, I'll make my family understand that I love her and need her in my life.

And that day never came. Since that day to this
day.... we never went to India back, so I and she were broken.

It's not that I didn't try to reach her, initially I did. The whole one year, I used to call her, message her, about everything, but I never saw any blue tick mark. I called her zillion times and always that call went to voice mails. I left so many voicemails, e-mails, even letters but nothing worked.

Leaving hope one day, I stopped calling her, I stopped messaging her gradually.

But in my heart I still knew it beats... only for her.

"Nandini ke bare me soch raha hai?" I heard Cabir from beside me.

He was the only one with whom I could talk about Nandini. Others never cared or maybe never had a courage to talk about her with me.

"Nahi.... bas... yuhi." I spoke gulping the remaining beer.

He smiled and shook his head "aur tu mujhse aaj tak jhuth nahi bol pata"

I smiled sadly and looked up to see stars shining bright.

"Stars... she hated them, but I loved them. She told me once that she'll be my star and she'll shine the brightest for me. And see today... she actually shined for me, for us... that is why we are America's famous band who plays in billions and millions.... but..." I stopped as I felt a tear dropping down from my eye.

I closed my eye and tried not to cry. Damn.... I cry but in alone. I don't want my friends to feel guilty about breaking us.

"But she is not there with you... with us" Cabir spoke and I sighed.

There was a awkward silence in between us. And why not? Cabir also felt guilty of not speaking anything at that time. But we all were bounded to react the same way but just me.

I curse myself, I should have met her before leaving saying that I will come back to her. I will always be her monster and she... she will always be my star. Hamesha.