Bad Romance [Darkstache (Darkiplier x Wilford Warfstache)]

Chapter 9

Dark
Finally, 7:00. Dark teleports to the address Ron gave him and rings the doorbell. While waiting, he looks the building over. An apartment building that seems to have quite a few two room apartments.

The door opens to reveal a nervous looking Ron, who is also wearing a suit, but his is a white one with a red tie. He grins when he sees Dark and Dark smiles back.

"Hey, Mark! You look n-nice," Ron stutters.

"Thanks, you do, too. Shall we go?" Dark asks, holding out his arm.

"Sure!" Ron says, taking his arm. "But... Where's your car?"

"Oh, right. It's a nice night, so I thought we'd walk."

"Oh, of course."

Along the way, Ron asks a lot of questions about where they are going and Dark gives as vague answers as possible before they come to  a recently abandoned restaurant. Dark had called in a couple of favors to keep the lights on and make it look authentic. Dark grins as he opens the door for Ron.

"After you," he says. Ron blushes and mumbles a thank you.

"Ah, bonjour, your reservation tickets, please," says the waiter. Wait a second. Dark has heard that sentence before. Somewhere...

Dark cries out as a sharp pain dances through his head. He collapses onto the floor.

"Mark!" Yells Ron. Just like that, the pain is gone. Dark stands up as Ron frantically asks: "Are you all right?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I just get migraines sometimes. I'm fine," Dark lies. But what was that? Dark has never heard anyone say that before. He definitely would have remembered.

"Here, let me help you to your chair," Ron says. He holds Dark's arm and gently guides him towards the table. Ugh, this guy is so nice and sweet that it's actually sickening. Dark stops him.

"Actually, I had something else in mind..." Dark says. Ron's face is bright red as he turns toward Dark.

"M-mark, don't you think it's a bit earl-" he stops talking when he sees the knife in Dark's hand. "W-what-" Dark grins at the terror etched across Ron's face. He knows Ron is about to scream, so he pushes him up to against the wall by his throat.

"Oh, I am going to enjoy this," Dark says, and he raises the knife.

Time Skip, brought to you by Dark's _____________latest victim_____________

Wilford
"Seriously, Host? Why the last minute interview?" Wilford asks with a sigh as they're walking down the hallway.

"The Host was told that the meeting is urgent," The Host replies, staring straight ahead.

"Told by who?" Wilford asks, taking out his knife. "I'll chop 'em up and put 'em in a stew for making me do anything this late at night."

"The Host does not think that is healthy."

"Fuck healthy."

The two are walking down the hallway, when suddenly Dark appears in front of them. His suit is drenched in human blood, but not a spot of it is on his skin. Typical Dark: somehow managing to get blood only where he wants to get blood. Wilford will never understand. Plus, the carefulness ruins the fun.

"Shit," Dark mutters. "I did not expect anyone to be out here at this time of night." He checks his watch and Wilford peaks at it too. 10:53.

"Whelp, gotta go interview some new Ipliers. Apparently it's urgent. Oh, maybe they saw the ad I posted for Tag With Bullets! I've been looking for people to play!" Wilford says, suddenly excited. No one ever wants to play Tag with Bullets! Of course, maybe because Wilford always wins... Meh, poor losers.