still falling ↠ hunter hayes

chapter nineteen //

Chapter Nineteen

“

        He seemed lost in thought, thinking over my words. I leaned toward him, putting my hand over his. I wanted to tell him I needed him, that I wanted him. Did he hate me for leaving him? I hated myself for it. My lips fell into a frown.

        I heard his stomach grumble, breaking the silence.

        "Hungry?" I said with a laugh. He smiled, "I guess so."

        I pushed myself off my bed, leading him into the kitchen, “Do you like grilled cheese?”

        He laughed, “Yes, I do,” he leaned against the counter, “It’s funny, we know so much about each other but, we don’t know silly things like that.”

        I smiled, “I think that kind of stuff happens over time.”

        I focused on not burning his food, dwelling over the past as I flipped the sandwich.

        "I’m never gonna forgive myself for what I did to you," I said, sitting next to him at my table.

        "I didn’t forgive you until I saw your reaction to what happened. I know you left because you loved me. Watching you in so much pain killed me. It doesn’t change how much it hurt for you to leave though. I’ve still got a lot of anger towards you about that."

        "Watching you in pain killed me," I said, my heart feeling as if it’d been ripped apart, "You can stay mad at me. You should."

        My mind created the image I hated, him in blood, shaking. Was putting someone before you love? If so, I’d failed him. I’d left when I shouldn’t have. We were silent until I uttered three small words, “Is that love?”

        I rested my head in my hands, thinking it over. Loving someone enough to leave.

        "I don’t know. I just know that I’ve never felt like I do with anyone else except you." His words were quiet as he took a bite of the sandwich, nodding his head in approval.

        "I’m really sorry, Hunter. I really am." He was silent, letting my apologies fill the air.

—-

Hunter’s POV

        I didn’t know how long we had been talking. She kept apologizing and I kept trying to stop being mad at her. I understood why she left, I may have done the same thing as her if I’d been in her shoes. We’d been sitting in silence, an awkward tension in the air.

        I shook my head, my action catching her attention. It hadn’t been her fault and it hadn’t been mine either. We’d both made mistakes over time. I met her eyes, letting her know the words on my mind, “You didn’t like the cameras from the beginning. I saw it getting worse, I didn’t want to fight over it. I let myself pretend it wasn’t an issue until you couldn’t take it. We both were selfish at times. It’s happened, I’m over it. I’m done being mad if you’re done apologizing for it.”

        Her eyes were watching me, studying me all over. I finally snapped my fingers, drawing her attention back to my eyes, “Sorry, I missed looking at you.”

        I laughed, seeing her blush through the darkness. She pushed her chair back, taking my hand. I held it tightly, missing her touch. She pulled me through the hallway, down toward her room. I picked her up halfway down the hall, her feet wrapping around my waist.

        Kissing her was a dream. Better than a memory could ever remember. Magic. I could feel the smile on her lips as I dropped her on her bed. She grabbed my shirt, pulling me back toward her. She pulled her shirt over her head, leaning into me. As she kissed me, it was like she was purring, a soft moan leaving her lips.

        She was driving me insane. I grabbed my shirt, pulling it over my head. She was kissing down my chest. I felt her stop, hand reaching toward my side, fingers running across the thick scar.

        "I would have switched places with you in a heartbeat," she whispered, her hand shaking as her fingers traced my scar once more.

        I shook my head, “I wouldn’t have allowed that.”

        I leaned up, breaking our contact. She frowned.

        I laughed at her pouting face, “I really need to find a hotel or something though. I’ve been driving all day,” I said, rubbing some of the sleep out of my eyes.

        "Did you really think I wouldn’t let you stay here?"

        I shrugged. In three hours we went from screaming to kissing in bed. My mind refused to believe I wasn’t dreaming.

        She pulled me back toward her, kissing my lips gently, whispering in my ear, “I want you here.”

        She emphasized ‘want’ making my mind swirl with a million thoughts. I kissed her again, leaning her back against her bed. I was hers for tonight and right now, that was enough.

"

A/N

The picture is of aspen, and she's the girl on the right.. :D