Prompt:In which Tony Stark dies, and Peter blames himself.
Word count: 1039
Warnings: i mean it's pretty sad but other than that nothing
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The night was quiet.
Everyone sat in the same room, their faces blank. Their minds black. Their breath a hush.
You looked beside you, examining the empty spot, imagining Peter being there. Peter was affected the most. His idol, his teammate, the man who was like a father was now dead- and it was his fault. Or so he felt it was.
Peter attempted to save Tony, but wasn't quick enough. He felt that if he paid attention sooner then Tony would still be alive, but either way, the rest of you knew there was no way to help. Even if Peter was fast enough, one of them would die, and not even Wakanda's technology would be able to save them.
You looked back at your hands, continuing to fiddle. You hated this kind of quiet- this hurt, lingering silence. It made you feel uneasy, dizzy, hopeless. Like everyone has just given up. You didn't want everyone to give up, but at the same time, you couldn't see the light at the end of the tunnel.
You began to think about Peter once more. You couldn't imagine the kind of heart break he was feeling, you were scared for him to be alone. Your mind wandered, thinking of ways to help him, what you could say.
After a while of thinking, you stood up. Everyone saw you move out of the corner of their eye, but their brain didn't register to look at you. They continued to fiddle or stare into nothingness like statues as you walked towards Peter's room.
You stood in front of his door, tears prickling your eyes as you saw all the iron man stickers. A slight tear fell when you saw the note Tony had written on his door.
You're a good kid, Pete. You're gonna go places, just keep working hard. - Tony P.S. Stop touching my suit, I know those fingerprints are yours.
You chuckled slightly. Tony was never one for affection, and even his notes had to have some kind of smart remark within them. Deep down, though, you all knew he cared for you.
Taking a deep breath, you knocked on Peter's door. You heard sniffles and muffled sobbing, even a few gasps. He was crying so hard he could hardly catch his breath. Your heart ached even more imagining him crying like that. You barged in, seeing Peter laying on his bed with his head buried in his pillow.
He didn't seem to notice you, so you closed the door to get his attention. He snapped his head towards you, his nose red and eyes swollen. "Go away!" He sniffled before turning and laying away from you.
You sighed, releasing your hand from the door knob. "I don't want to leave you alone." You said softly, trying to hide the shakiness in your voice. Looking around his room, you saw many iron man photos, posters, action figures, comic books, and even photos of him and Tony.
Seeing all of it...and knowing that Tony wouldn't be here for another photo or for another note on the door....it broke you.
You regained your composure, though, once you heard Peter sniffle. You sat at the end of the bed and patted his leg. "Come here." You said, your voice almost a whisper. Peter didn't move, he just continued to cry as quiet as he could.
"Peter, I said come here."
Peter sniffled once more before sitting up. He swung his legs over and let his feet hit the ground before sighing loudly. He rubbed his swollen, red eyes tiredly. You could tell he had drained himself- his face was pale, his lips were try, his whole face was puffy. The poor kid was a mess.
"It's my fault." He said, his voice stuffed and dull.
"No, it wasn't. No one could've helped him, Pete." You tried to put your hand on his shoulder, but he shuffled away from you.
"Yes, it is! If I could've-if I could've just turned back a few seconds earlier I could've helped him!" He was now raising his voice, frustration and regret rolled off of his tongue.
"Peter that's ridiculous, a few seconds wouldn't have made a difference-"
"I don't need you to try and make me feel better by lying to me. Just go away I don't need you here." Peter turned his head away from you, almost as if he was shunning you. You only sighed, thinking of what to say next.
"Peter please stop blaming yourself. You're not the only one who went after him, Steve tried too. It was just....too late."
Peter didn't reply for a moment. "I'm the one to blame." His voice was raspy and cold.
"The one to blame for this is Thanos, not you." You got close enough to Peter so you could wrap your arm around him. "Look at me."
He turned his head, allowing you to see how much he really was drained. You could see how worthless he felt, how his eyes drooped from exhaustion and stress, how colorless his face was, how bent his frown was.
"This isn't your fault, and never believe that. We are not blaming you, and," you trailed off, biting your lip to refrain from tearing up, "if he were here, Tony wouldn't either."
The mention of his name made a tear slip down Peter's puffy face, yet he continued to listen. "You are one of the people who knows him best. So, do you think he would want you to sit here and blame yourself, or do you think he'd want you to get up and continue to save the world?"
Peter looked down, knowing the answer. He didn't have to say it, you knew it too. "It's okay to mourn and to be upset and angry, but it's not okay to sit here and blame yourself for something you didn't cause."
You then stood up, reaching your hand out to him. "Now, let's go out there and figure out what to do next, okay?"
Peter slightly smiled before taking your hand. "Okay."
*****
Wow, this was really something out of my comfort zone. I mean, I know I've done sad chapters before but I really put my own personal feelings into this one.
Tbh I've been thinking about losing Tony and Steve A LOT recently and I'm honestly gonna be so so upset after Infinity War, so I figured I'd just write something similar to how I feel so I can feel better??
Honestly I really hope Tony or Steve doesn't die because if they do then it's over for me lol, anyways I hope you all enjoyed 💘
Also thank you so much for 61k, that's so crazy!! You guys are so amazing ilysm, I'm so so grateful ah! Just thank you thank you thank you!!
