Care.

-Chapter 12-

I woke up on the cold stone floor, my skin prickled with goosebumps. I had to blink a few times in order to bring things around me into focus. I didn't want to move, everything in my body felt either shattered or torn to shreds. Being careful not to injure myself more, I weakly pressed my stinging palms into the rock floor, pushing my battered body off the ground. The view below me was horrifying; blood was drying in huge spatters and pools on the floor, some patches holding short black strings. My hands were soaked in blood, and my arms were almost entirely black and blue.

Wh-what the hell..

Bracing myself, I got onto my knees and then slowly came to a stand.

Haaaah...It hurts...s-so much.

My breath rattled as I began making my way to the staircase, unstably staggering on my beaten legs. I took one foot off the ground, placing it gently on the stair above, and nearly toppled over backwards. Blinking, I stood in place for a moment.

Fine. I'll just crawl.

Carefully and slowly, I got onto my hands and knees, yet I don't think it hurt any less than standing. In fact, it likely hurt more.

At least I won't fall and hurt myself further.

I edged forwards to the stairs, and placed a hand gingerly on the cold step. It felt like my hands had been stripped of their flesh, but I needed some way to get up, and there was no chance I was going to be asking mom. ''Probably isn't even home.'' I muttered to myself, grimacing as a large, black bruise on my knee landed directly on the hard stone. I closed my eyes, breathing evenly for a moment. I knew I was only on the first 3 steps, with my left hand on the third and my right knee on the first.

I just need to get through this as quickly as possible. Need to get out before mom comes home.

Holding my breath, I slowly started crawling up the steps. ''Ah...Ahha..'' I breathed out reflexively, each part of my body feeling more broken than the step before as I made my way up. I finally reached the kitchen, and flopped down onto the floor, exhausted and hurt. My face rested on the cool tiles, and it felt nice to have something cold over my face since I knew it was bruised without even needing to look at it. But, as much as I dreaded moving more, I knew I needed to get into my room and away from here.

Using the same method I did for the basement stairs, I began crawling up the carpeted staircase leading to the second floor of my house. Panting, I managed to keep placing one hand in succession with the opposite leg on each stair above me, and once again collapsed at the top of the stairs breathlessly. ''I made it, at least.'' I mumbled to myself half-heartedly, slowly and clumsily gathering my balance to stand. Sighing, I staggered across the hallway and went into my room. To my slight surprise, there sat a crumpled note with messy handwriting scribbled onto it sitting on my bed. Cocking an eyebrow, I sat down carefully and picked it up, holding it in both hands.

''You idiot. You fucking idiot. Why did you think that was a bloody good idea? Are you mentally insane, Sam? Honestly. Get it the fuck together if you want to keep me as your girlfriend, because I'm already tired of your stupid mental problems. Why can't you take my feelings into consideration? Are you that selfish? Am I just a shred of paper to you? Treat me right, or I'll make it happen.

-Chasity.''

My heart had completely sunk to my stomach after I finished reading the note. Hands trembling, I simply placed it back on my bed, and cupped my face in my hands. Tears stung my bruises and seemed to burn like acid through my wound-ridden skin, but I couldn't hold back anymore. My soft cries quickly turned into wailing sobs as I thought about how much of a failure I was.

WHY AM I LIKE THIS?! WHY CAN'T I BE WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE?!

My thoughts drowned everything else out, and I let out a long, ear-splitting scream into my scraped hands until my throat burned. With a sniffle, I slowly released my hands from my face, placing them on my lap. I stared down at myself miserably. The cuts I'd made yesterday were caked with dry blood, and through the crumbling crimson patches were so many bruises you wouldn't be able to tell my skin colour at first glance. Shifting my gaze to my other arm, I saw one large, snake-like black line coiling up the appendage. Did she beat me that hard?

Surrounding it were vomit-inducing shades of green and blue, along with dirty scrapes.

I can't believe I was so stupid.

I turned to the mirror on the wall behind me, and came to a stand. My lip had a long, jagged gash across it, and both of my eyes were horribly bloodshot, surrounded by rings of black and blue. My hair was matted and unkempt, sticking up in places I'd never seen it stand up in before, and was crusty and dried with old blood. Dark mahogany, almost black stains were splattered all across my clothing, my stomach area being the darkest. Trying not to hurt myself, I hesitantly began pulling my shirt off. My shirt stuck painfully to the areas spattered with blood, making it difficult and even more agonizing to take it off. My abdomen looked like something from a sci-fi movie, still oozing slowly with dark liquid, and scratches were scattered all across my skin, along with dark bruises surrounding some of them. Tears once again filled my glossy, tired eyes. I sat back down, feeling helpless and lost.

I'm so stupid.