I saw you first (Sons of Anarchy Fanfic)

Broken pieces

BELLA'S POV*

Sometimes you are never ready to do certain things. Seeing Chibs was one of those things for me. The adrenaline was wearing off and the nerves were starting to kick in. I heard the clubhouse door open and it was like time had slowed down and then stopped completely.

Chibs walked out first and behind him followed a sheepish looking Filip, and I had suddenly found my courage again.

"Filip go wait by the car with your sister" I said as firmly as I could praying my voice wouldn't shake. I was surprised when Filip did as he was told.

I walked over to Chibs as Filip left his side and ran to the car. 

"Well" I Said as I stared at Chibs, looking over his tired and aged face.  I didn't want to think about what has happened since I have been gone.  By the looks of it, it definitely wasn't him taking care of himself. 

"I never thought I would see you again" he said looking at the ground and in that moment I knew it wasn't me who was going to be he first to break down. 

"I'm sorry it had to happen like this.. I never told Filip about you until the other day" and as those words left my mouth I felt the weight of the guilt crush me and the tears threatened to fall. 

"I should have told him about you, I shouldn't have kept him from you... but after everything that had happened ... how could you expect me to raise children in that kind of environment..."

I was rambling, trying to make it seem ok, that I took his children away from him.  I hadn't realised I was shaking until Chibs grabbed my hands and squeezed them tight the shaking continuing throughout the rest of my body, I flinched when I felt him touch me and he must have sensed it as he let go quickly.

"I'm sorry to Bella... I can't make it up to you and I don't deserve to have you in my life, but I just want to thank you for looking after our children."

The tears were falling fast down my face now and every feeling I had ever felt for this man came rushing back into my body and it was overwhelming. Chibs closed the gap between us and pulled my body to his hugged me tight to him as if it was the last time he was ever going to hug me or if he hugged me tight enough I would never leave again ..as if this was going to keep all the broken pieces together.

"Can I see her?" He whispered in my ear...

I nodded into his chest.  "Let's go see your daughter".