Vampire blood (Bloody dreams) - rewriting, on hold at the moment

Vampire blood XLII

CHAPTER XLII

ALEXANDER'S POV

I silently followed Henry and Michael as they walked towards Oliver's medical laboratory in order to try to examine Alexia's health situation and wake her up, even if I knew that she couldn't be put together anymore. She was too badly wounded and that simple thought was able to torn my heart into millions of little pieces.

'I did this to her! ' I screamed inside my mind, trying to accept that unfortunately I was the one who hurt her.

I was the monster, the soulless creature that didn't deserve to receive her love, because I was born with the single purpose of destruction, because I wasn't able to keep her safe and most of all because I was the one who hurt her in the most horrible way.

Even if I knew all these things, I couldn't understand why she even cared about me, let alone love me, when it was pretty obvious that I was not worthy of receiving love, let alone hers.

She was too different and most of all too good for someone like me and I knew that I should have stayed away from her since the beginning, but my selfishness forced me once more to make the wrong choice and force her into a world full of pain, cruelty and despair.

My world was not a place where she should be, considering the fact that our fate was to perish as a result of our hate and most of all because of our insatiable hunger, but even so I couldn't stay away from her even if I should have stayed as far away as possible.

Knowing who I was and what I was capable of she accepted everything so easily like this was the most normal reality. She knew the truth and even so she decided to stay by my side.

'Why? Why? Why did she even care about me?! ' I tried to understand but found no logical explanation for her strange behaviour.

I knew that I definitely didn't deserve her love and care, and, besides that, I knew that I definitely didn't deserve everything she was forced to do in order to save my life. I was a vampire, a pureblood, by far worse than any other vampire of my kind, because in my blood lingered a demonic ancient type of blood, making me more cruel and violent.

The pureblood vampires were even worse than the rest of our kind, considering the fact that our blood was directly linked with the darkness. I was the worst of them, I wasn't meant to feel love, or to care about someone else, because all I was meant to do was to kill. I knew it since I was just a child. Even when I was just five years old I felt the coldness inside my soul, the emptiness and despair and yet she chose me.

I've always known that it was really stupid to believe that we could have a chance and that a human child could change who we really were, but I let myself be mesmerized by the idea of finally meeting someone who could help us be better. She was way too fragile and too weak in order to complete such a task, being able to heal such a millenary hate and pain.

She was a celestial creature a seraphim with white skin and green piercing eyes, while I was the pure representation of evil, a murderer, a demon. I was meant to crush her into nothingness because of who I was. It was just a matter of time until she was meant to lay dead in my arms.

She struggled for too long to survive beside us and being who she really was, a fragile human girl, I was sure she couldn't stand against us any longer. After receiving so many blows as a result of her cruel destiny she couldn't take it anymore. And I, the one who was meant to help her and protect her from everyone and everything, I only managed to harm her, to put her in even more danger than her fate already reserved for her.

I took away from her everything she cared about, everything that made her who she really was. I forced her into this hateful sinful world of which I was part of.