Different Is Good

Twenty one

"He's not whipped." Barbara said. "He loves her and he cares about how she feels. He will make a wonderful husband and father one day."
"I would prefer both had been in about ten years, but I agree," Jess said, watching as Lindsey jogged up the stairs to Stevie's room.

"Baby? Are you hungry?"
He knocked again and saw her curled up, fast asleep in bed. He smiled, sitting down next to her with her plate in his lap.

"Honey? Sweetheart, you need to eat." He stroked her face and kissed her forehead.
"Feed me," she puckered her bottom lip

"Feed you?" Lindsey chuckled, rubbing her side

"Yeah, I'm so tired," she replied like a child
Lindsey sat a little closer and spoon fed her mashed potatoes, listening to her moan. Meals were pleasurable to Stevie, especially as she got bigger. She could eat and eat, Lindsey watching on with eyes bulging. No wonder Sara was getting so big in there. Stevie perked up a little, raising up onto her elbows as he continued to feed her.
"Is it good?" He chuckled, watching her dab at her mouth

"Mmhm!" She nodded excitedly

"Eat up! Little Sara will grow!"
Stevie suddenly stopped, sitting up fully. "What?"

"We want Sara to grow, don't we? She needs to get big and strong in there. Only another month or so left."

"But she's huge!" Stevie said, bursting into tears.
"It's okay!" Lindsey took her into his arms and rocked her, "she will be perfect! Everything will be fine!" He kissed the side of her head, he had much to learn about women in general, much less pregnant women
"But what if I can't lose the weight and I'm fat forever?" Stevie wailed and Lindsey tried his best not to laugh.

"You won't be!" he reassured her.

She pushed him away. "Oh, you don't know!"
"I know you will. I will love you no matter how you look because you are always beautiful to me."
"Promise?" Stevie asked and Lindsey nodded, kissing her forehead.
"Take a nap, the midwife will be here in an hour," He helped her lay back, rubbing her large stomach, "Let Mommy sleep a little, Sara."
"You're going to lay with me, aren't you?"

"Sure, angel." He got in behind her, wrapping his arms around her. She drifted off easily as he rubbed her stomach in slow circles.
Lindsey gently lifted her hand, looking at the promise ring he had given her. Stevie had never taken it off and seemed proud to wear it. Lindsey on the other hand had been having second thoughts about his capabilities as a parent and partner. He often worried about not knowing what to do or mixing up stuff and hurting the baby. He hadn't spoke of Stevie about any of his fears but as her due date grew closer he felt more and more stuck.
He carefully got out of bed and went downstairs. He needed space, he needed to go for a walk. He quietly left the house, careful not to slam the front door and alert anyone. He exhaled heavily, feeling like he could finally breathe.
"Calm down. Calm down," he cried to himself as he paced, feeling a melt down approaching. He hadn't had one in months...
He ran a hand through his unruly curls that Stevie loved so much. He thought about Stevie and their daughter, frightened and nervous. He couldn't go to anyone, especially not Stevie about how he felt. He couldn't take someone telling him how selfish or stupid he was for needing a break.
Ruth appeared from their house, "Lindsey, it's alright!" Carefully approaching him as she knew the signs
Lindsey stopped and looked at her, leaning into her as soon as she was close enough. She wrapped her arms around him and her tall son laid his head on her shoulder and cried.
"Come in the house, we don't want Stevie to see you," She wrapped her arm around him and led him to their house. "Tell me what's wrong, hm? Tell me," Ruth encouraged softly
"I'm not good at anything. I'm a bad husband, a bad father...the baby's not even here yet and I'm failing. Stevie is so...and I'm..." He couldn't come up with the right words, sighing heavily.
"You are not any of those things! That girl would be in a heck of a situation if you weren't here! Stevie and Sara adore you! You are made for Stevie!" Ruth took his face in her hands