Life After Death

Anxiety Attacks

As I slowly woke up, I saw Lena there.  She had a worried expression on her face and had my hand to her face.  I immediately took my free hand and put it on her shoulder.  When I did, it must've scared her.  She pulled her hands away from me and just stared.

"How are you feeling?" Oh... my... Rao... I couldn't hear her.  I thought that the inability of hearing would have just gone away.  But, I still couldn't hear.  I started to worry,  what if someone was in trouble in the night and I didn't wake up because I couldn't hear them?

"I can't hear you... Lena." I saw her face drop down into a frown.  I knew that she was unhappy... obviously.

"I'm sorry Kara... I won't talk." I'm guessing she said.  That's what her lips looked like they said.  She patted me on the shoulder and left.  I then saw James meet Lena at the doorway to take her outside.  Alex was left standing at the door.  She didn't knock because... well, I couldn't hear.

She came to the side of my bed and sat there.  She took my hand and let out a couple tears.  I sat up quickly and pulled her close to me.  I hugged her and let her cry on my shoulder.

After a little while, I took her hands and looked at her eyes.  I put my hand up to her face and rubbed the tears off.  She sniffed a couple times.

"Alex, this isn't permanent." She shook her head and looked at me again.  She took out her phone and texted what she wanted to say.

"Kara, how do you know?" When She showed me her screen I cried.  I didn't want to talk like this.  I wanted to hear her voice again.  But her showing me a message on her phone like that, sucked all of the hope out of me.

"Alex please don't talk like this.  We are going to get my hearing back." She then looked at her phone and began typing a new message.

"I'm sorry Kara, it's just... I've never not been able to talk to you without to not being able to hear me.  I want to be able to talk to you."

"You will, Alex.  Just, please have hope." She replied with a head nod and held my hand.  She acted as if she never wanted to let go.

"I'm not going anywhere.  I love you Alex."

"I love you too." Alex said.  I fell asleep while Alex was still holding my hand.  When I did, Lena was there again.  She was gently rubbing my arm as she stared blankly at the wall.

"Are you okay?" I watched her mouth for movement, but nothing happened.  She just stared into space.  I grew concerned for my friend, she normally would've responded by now.

"Lena?" Still nothing.  I could feel anxiety rise into my chest until I felt myself sweating.  Was she upset with me?  I didn't know.  When she looked at me her eyes turned dark black.  Then I realized, that I was dreaming.

I woke up with sweat dripping down my face with Lena and Alex by my side.  I still couldn't hear anything.  But I knew that there was wrong with me.  More than just not being able to hear people.  Alex held onto my hand as I quickly sat up in my bed.  The dream terrified me.  It didn't feel like a dream though, it felt so real.  Apparently I was hyperventilating in my sleep, I didn't know how that worked... but it did.

A few minutes later, when I looked at Lena she looked at me with tears in her eyes.  She was about to talk, but then quickly shut her mouth when she saw how stressed and afraid I was.  I stared at their and cocked my head.  She then let out a couple tears and ran out of the room.  She knew something that I didn't.