Close Your Eyes

six; ❝i will never forget❞

"Sure, right," I tell her.

"Well, I bet you two will end up being great friends again soon," she says.

She gets up from my bed, and gives me a kiss on my forehead. I appreciate her kind words, but I know that what she said will never be true. It would be impossible for someone else to understand everything that's happened between Rosa and I.

"I'll be in my office working," she says before closing my door, and leaving me alone in my fears and losses.

The glimmer of hope does appear though, and I even begin to think that there's a chance that Rosa and I can still be friends.

"I shouldn't even believe that." I tell myself.

"Aurora! A girl named Rosa is here to see you!" My mom yells from downstairs.

What? She can't be serious.

It only takes me seconds to run downstairs, and I find that it is, in fact, Rosa. She's standing in my doorway, completely relaxed with her backpack in her hands and a smile on her face. Her hair is tied up in a ponytail, and her wardrobe is all fresh, making her appear fine as if nothing had ever happened.

"I just came to ask you about the English homework. I didn't understand it very well," she says.

It's difficult to believe that, considering the fact that I'm always the one asking her for help in that area.

"Of course, I'll help you with it."

"Well, you two should get started on that homework," my mom says as she goes into her office.

That leaves Rosa and I alone in the front entrance of my home, looking like two complete fools who have no idea what to do.

"M-m-my bedroom is upstairs," I stutter.

You're an idiot, Aurora.

We walk up the stairs, and we go into my room. I haven't had anyone in my room since I moved here, so it's a strange feeling to have someone here.

I recall all the complicated times when my best friend would come over, and we would sleep over at each other's houses and spend every waking moment together. We had an unbreakable bond, until my sexuality forced us apart.

It's a vulnerable place for me, but I'm glad that she's here.

"So, what about the English homework isn't making sense?" I ask her.

I'm still confused as to why she came here just for that, but I'm not going to ask about it. She seems focused on doing this rather than covering other more important topics, such as our kiss.

"I don't understand any of it. I haven't been paying much attention in class these last few days," she says.

And that's not shocking to me. I had noticed that she was always distracted in English class, acting as if she was off in another perfect world. Selfishly, I had hoped that it was because of our kiss.

"I understand it," I say.

She stays silent.

"Rosa?"

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry about what happened the other day in my treehouse," I apologize.

"Honestly, I actually came because I wanted to talk to you about that. I do need some help with the work, but I just used it as an excuse to come talk to you. So, can we not talk about what happened from now on? That's all I wanted to say."

It's honestly funny that she would come here just to talk about something that she doesn't want us to talk about, but I can't complain. Pretending seems like a nice solution, as long as we can stay friends.

"Right. Do you still want to look at my homework though?"

"Sure," she responds as she finally lets out a huge breath that she had been holding in.

I grab the stacks of paper form my desk, and I gently hand it to her. In the small interaction, I feel her fingers brush against mine, and the crowd of colorful butterflies immediately appear in my stomach.

I can't help but look at her as she reads over the numerous complicated words on my paper, taking it all in. At one point, she even bites her lips as she tries to focus on it.

She's so cute.

I shove the thought away from my mind. Somehow, I don't want to make her uncomfortable, even if she doesn't know what I'm thinking.

"It makes much more sense now. If it wasn't for you then I would definitely would have gotten a failing grade on this assignment," she says.

I can't help but blush.

"No, you wouldn't, you're really smart," I compliment her.

"I should go now. Thanks for your help," she says, but I notice that her face turns a shade of bright pink.

"No problem."

Wordlessly, we both head downstairs. Our moment is over, and all I can do is open the door for her and watch her escape from my home.

"Bye," she says before turning around for one last time.

She gives me another little wave before she leaves, making a deep breath escape from my lips after she's gone. All I can think about is how amazing she is, and how much of a fool I am for thinking that about her.

I turn back around, and make my way back upstairs to my room. It seems so much plainer now, with pink paint and frilly sheets making my place appear much more childish. Everyone around me moves on, except for me. I'm still here, and I'm still helplessly falling for girls that will never feel the same way toward me.

For the rest of my day, I'm unable to get her off my mind. And maybe, I don't want to.

Because even if this is wrong and my entire world could be destroyed again, I still enjoy the risk.