Dare Trilogy | Book 3 Editing | ✓

2.16 | Awake + Time To Live

That smile... it had confirmed for me just how much he wanted for me to stay, how much he needed that, how much it meant to him that I made that decision. This guy... sometimes, I don't understand him. I really do wish I could read his mind to learn in clear terms what he feels for me. It would help so much instead of having to keep playing these guessing games and relying on what others imply.

I exhaled and whispered aloud, not thinking about whether or not he would wake up and hear me talking. "Why do you fight it? You want my forgiveness. My anger hurts you. Everyone says you don't let anything affect you... then why me? You say you don't care what anyone thinks of you, then why does it matter what I think of you? You say your family is incomplete without me but what if I can't be what you need? I know... you won't hurt me. I trust you, even when I swore to myself I wouldn't trust you again. You always manage to get me even in my darkest moments but I don't know why it scares me, Arnav. What if things become difficult for you again and you push me away again? I can't... I don't want to lose you again. I..."

He stirred, and I stopped talking at once. His eyes fluttered open seconds later as I held my breath, worrying if he heard me and if so, just how much? He groaned at the sudden brightness invading his view. When he turned to move to his side, his eyes fell on me. "Were you saying something?"

I assume he woke up due to all my talking. I lied, "Yeah, I've been trying to wake you up the last five minutes."

He gave me a wary look. I assume it was him deciding whether or not to believe that. Then, he spoke, "Well, did you say my name? I usually wake up right away hearing my name."

"Well, I did call you Lord Governor. You didn't wake up." I answered, throwing in a pinch of sarcasm while my heart was going crazy worrying if he had overhead me talking and if so, just how much? See, Khushi, this is why you don't act like those TV actors who talk out loud to themselves because someone always overhears!

He rolled his eyes and sat up, "Sweet pea, don't start this the first thing in the morning."

I chuckled at his irritation. He ran his hand through his hair. His muscles flexed as he lifted them, and I found my eyes traveling away from his face. Without meaning to, I questioned, "Why do you guys sleep without a shirt?"

"The same reason you girls find it comfortable to sleep in our oversized tees." He commented, not paying too much attention to my question and taking it lightly.

I felt the need to point out, "Hey, I wear my own oversized tees."

He snorted, "Yes, because you are the only one who buys a size bigger. All other girls steal their boyfriends' shirts."

"Yeah, okay," I mumbled. "No need to remind me of my outfits back in college."

"How did we get on this topic anyway?" He suddenly questioned, making me think he was just now truly waking up and getting all of his senses.

"Never mind," I refused to remind him of the question I had originally asked. If I did, this time, he wouldn't have let it go as easily. He would have found a way to tease the life out of me first, and then let the topic go. "Di sent me to wake you up. You're awake. My job is done. Bye."

"Wait," He said, but I had already stood up, "Are you sure you weren't saying anything before? I swear I heard you talking."

I shook my head and meekly lied, "Nope, just waking you up." I tried to leave before he would have a chance to speculate.

He, however, was quicker and reached for my hand. My breath hitched, only because it was unanticipated. By now, he had held my hand enough times for me to get comfortable to it without freaking out. I turned to face him when he remained silent to see why he held my hand.