Unrequited Love for No One in Particular

I Like to Think

I like to think I'm low
Even if I'm surfing crowds
I like to think I have higher to go
Even if I'm up in the clouds
But I'm not really up in the clouds
Bathed in translucent shrouds
I just like to think that I think I'm low
In reality, I really don't know.

I look from many perspectives
Many of them are confusing
Half of them seem prospective
But more of them say that I'm losing
And in these perspectives I'm perusing,
It's my own that I seem to be losing
That's ostensibly imperfective,
But only because it's subjective

I fall asleep in the morning
The living happens at night
The moon seems to be less scorning
In the sun is when beasts like to fight
But believing depends on sight
And believing struggles by night
So by the suddenness of each morning
My subconscious trust is deforming

I've been gifted with beautiful clothes
Shirts of the finest lace
I've been robbed of my shoes, my toes
Are blistered all over the place
I can't tell if I'm leading the race
Or if I'm in last place
I'm over thinking my woes
But I fly when a soft wind blows

I think I might be in love
I might be clinging to fate
I think I'm talking from above
I might be lingering in hate
Back and forth between jaws of a gate
It might turn out too late
But between my hate and my love
There's a coexistence I can't break out of

I can't tell the right from the left
I can't tell the right from the wrong
My orientation bereft
My decisiveness gone along
I'm about to break out in song
For my friends to sing along
But I'm not sure if they've all left
If I'm alone in a rocky cleft

I can't decide if this poem
Is written as hopeful or hopeless
I hear somber and joyful tone
But at the same time, I say it so toneless
I can't tell if these lines are atrocious
Or if they're my magnum opus
Around possibilities I'll roam
Probably going alone

Whether I'm happy or not doesn't matter
I just like to think I am.