Unrequited Love for No One in Particular

Through Banks of Snow

I do not feel at ease
It's like I want to but can't sneeze
I've begun to cough and wheeze
I suppose it's a disease

Malevolent winter chill
Seems to have gotten to my bones
And now I've taken ill
I've succumbed to grunts and groans

Amidst the crystal flakes
The icy trees and frozen lakes
I know it is for my own sake
That my bones ache and freeze and break

I love this winter like a fantasy
I love the cold like I love life
I love the pain the cold has brought to me
I love the darkness, hate, and strife

The darkened thoughts help me see darkness
My night vision grows like ivy
I can feel the softened hardness
Of a life lived in surviving

And with this new perspective
I can better see the stars
The frozen lake reflective
Of my doubts, my grief, my scars

My life like constellations
Fading into pink sun rising
I come to the realization
There's nothing wrong with not surviving

I could stay here just too long
So that I'll never be found
I could sink into the lake
Drowning down, down, down, down...

But that would be a shame
If I have such a constellation
I wouldn't want to make it lame
When it deserves congratulation

I know that every light
Will be balanced out by fear
This I shall not fight
Only live out year by year

As long as I can center
All my pain in the right places
I'll have chance as a mentor
I can put some smiles on faces

And thus I can achieve
Even when I can't believe
Even if I'm down so low
Almost freezing in the snow

But I'll always have my hope
I'll always have my pain to cope
I'll always have a bad disease
I'll always feel weak in the knees

And so life shall always go
On and on through banks of snow