The White Rose

Chapter 5 - Burning cities, black lungs and playing God.

"When we have lost everything, including hope, life becomes a disgrace, and death a duty" - W.C. Fields.

We were running through smoke for what felt like a lifetime, to find somewhere safe, but nothing seemed to be intact; everything was burning. Withering. Dying.

It felt as though time had slowed, and I was starting to lose hope that we would find solace anywhere – even for a short time – before we lost consciousness. We kept trying. Pushed ourselves and fought to keep ourselves alive and aware.

Eventually, we stumbled upon one place which rose out of the darkness, its steeple standing proudly above the veil of evil that was filling up our lungs. The clock began to chime twelve just as we pushed open the large wooden doors, the sounds of the chiming telling me that not everything could be destroyed. Something would always survive, no matter how small.

We tried to catch our breath, but as we looked around, it took our breath away completely. The pews were covered in faded pink ribbon. The red carpet was covered with rose petals, which were beginning to shrivel and wilt, crunching under our feet as we walked, releasing a musty scent that overwhelmed our senses. There was an old bible resting on the alter; the pages worn and the spine torn. There was something tragically beautiful about it all.

Then I saw it. A white veil on the ground, stained in blood. The innocence tainted with darkness. What made it worse was that the veil wasn’t the only thing on the ground, covered in blood. A pale hand was clutching it, the wedding ring glowing with the colours from the stained glass.

“Oh no,” I whispered. Ivy didn’t ask. She knew what I was talking about.

We ran over and knelt beside the bride. I checked for a pulse. At first I couldn’t feel anything, but then I felt something faint thud against my fingers. She was alive, but she wouldn’t last long.

I tried to wake her and after a moment she began to stir. Then she clutched her stomach in agony. There were two distinct gashes along her torso, and the blood was black.

When she finally opened her eyes fully, they were overflowing with pain. But it wasn’t physical.

“Where’s my husband?” She asked, her voice faltering. A tear rolled down her cheek and she repeated the question, gritting her teeth.

“Ivy, I’ll stay with her. Look for him.”

When she left, I asked “What’s your name?”

“Annabelle. Mrs. Annabelle White. I quite like the sound of that, don’t you?” Her voice was breaking. She sounded heartbroken.

“It’s beautiful. What’s your husband called?”

“Charles... Charlie,” she smiled.

Ivy ran up the stairs leading to the bell tower. I didn’t believe in God, but I started to pray anyway. I had just found hope and I didn’t want to lose it. This was supposed to be our sanctuary.

She walked down the stairs seconds later, her face drained of colour and her eyes wide. She shook her head to tell me it was too late.

I felt Annabelle’s pulse again. It was so weak.

“Your husband’s alive Annabelle,” I lied. I may not have had hope, but I wanted to give it to her in her last few moments.

She started to cry with happiness and she smiled up at me. The last words she spoke were “Thank you,” before her eyes rolled back and her hand went limp in mine.

I placed my shaking hand over her face and closed her eyes.

“Is her husband on the stairs?” I asked with a lump in my throat.

Ivy nodded, unable to take her eyes off the floor. She was crying.

I walked up the stone staircase, each step I took echoing off the walls. The fire from outside shone through the window like a beacon, warming the cold corpse lay before me. I picked him up and flew down the stairs to where Annabelle was. I set him down next to her and knelt beside them, moving the hair out of his eyes and closing them.

We sat in silence for hours and then I spoke. “We have to try and save them. You could use your song to try and heal their wounds couldn't you?"

“Leila, they’re dead. And look at him, there’s barely anything left...”

“You could try Ivy!” I tried to get to Annabelle and Charles but she stood in my way.

“I can’t,” she said through her teeth.

“Why not? I would do it if I could but all my gifts are good for are killing!”

“I can heal wounds, but even that takes my energy. I don’t have the strength it would take to bring them back to life. It would kill me. I’m not God.”

“Where is God Ivy? Why wasn’t God here to save them or anyone else? I’ll tell you where he was. Nowhere! He doesn’t exist and if he can’t save them, why shouldn’t we? Those who have the power to do what’s necessary should do it.”

She shook her head. “I can’t. I know that you’re upset but the point is, it would kill me before it would revive them.” I tried to get past but she stood her ground.

“Fine!” I shouted, my face just inches from hers. “Don’t save them.” As I said that, one of the stain glass windows shattered because of the fire and we covered our faces as the fragments rained down on us.

I walked away and threw open the church doors. A wave of heat blew in but it didn’t affect me. I didn’t breathe because of the smoke.

Ivy screamed at me to get back inside, coughing and spluttering as she did. I didn’t listen.

I had never attempted to tame a fire as large or as fierce as this one, but I had to try. The church wouldn’t hold forever.

I flew above the fire – it was dawn above the smoke – and closed my eyes. I concentrated only on the flames. Everything fell silent whilst I tried to focus every atom of my strength on taming the wild beast.

 My wings were beating softly behind me and the fire, once roaring and deafening, now just sounded like a faint crackle. I held my hands out and tried to imagine that I was reining it in, caging it like a tiger, its orange stripes being painted coal black. I felt the heat against my skin turn into a warm glow; the bright, clashing colours turning into nothing more than shadows in the dark.

I had done it. I had tamed the largest beast I’d ever faced. I felt lightheaded and as I fell from the sky, I once again heard the pounding sound inside my head.

I managed to stop myself from hitting the ground at full force by beating my wings. I felt completely drained.

Ivy ran out and asked me if I was okay.

I laughed. “That was brilliant.”

“Yeah it was,” she said, helping me to my feet. "You're crazy, I hope you know that."

Just as I was about to reply, the noise inside my head started again, but this time it was like I was being struck repeatedly by a hammer.

I put my head between my knees and put my hands over my ears, trying to cancel it out but I couldn’t.

My eyes started stinging with tears and I gritted my teeth. Was this a side effect of the venom? No. It had been there before then. It wasn’t as bad but everything had been heightened since I had been exposed to it.

I tried to think but it was nearing impossible. Then I remembered. The woods we came across before finding Emilie’s house.

“Ivy!” I yelled

I could barely hear her over the sound of the thudding. “Leila, what’s going on?”

“Get back inside the church and hide. There’s something I need to do.”

I looked up at her. She stopped and thought for a moment, then walked inside without asking one question.

The last thing I said was “I’ll be back soon,” before shutting the doors and running towards the source of the drumming noise, trying not to collapse from the pain.