Deadly

Chapter Five

My nightmares take me home. Home to where everything had changed for the worse. The day I met Atreyu. With his lithe body and damning eyes. I wanted  so much more than what I had but in the end I knew I could never have it. I deserved to be where I was now. With a heart in two pieces.

A long night with an even longer day preceding it. It’s dark and I’m at another of Cat’s wild parties.

“Hey,” I hear a voice coming from behind me. I don’t turn around. I try my best to focus. Ashden will hurt me if I talk.

Someone touches my arm and I flinch,”Did you hear me?”

“Yeah,” I relent.

“Are you ok?”

“No.”

"What's wrong?"

"Long story."

"You can tell me."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah."

I catch a glimpse of Ashden standing not too far away from me. He has his back to me which is good. If he saw me,I’d be dead right now. I hold my breath. I need to get away and fast.

“Can I have your number?”

“Huh?”

“Your number?”

“Yeah,” I absent mindedly write out my number on a slip of paper I had magically found in my back pocket.

“I’m Atreyu by the way.”

I look at him for real this time. How had I missed it before? He was tall and gorgeous. The guy who only existed in my dreams. What if…? What if I could be his girl friend?

My eyes snap open then. The darkness muddles my brain and I can’t tell what's real and what's not. I break down in tears. This wasn’t how things were supposed to be. This wasn’t how I wanted to be remembered. To be honest, I wanted to be with Atreyu. Not Ashden. Not my fears. I wanted to be loved. I wanted to be cared about. Not hit. Not kicked. Not broken.

I reach blindly for my phone. I had to see that last message. I had to. I needed some form of comfort even though I knew I didn’t deserve any. My hand finds it in minutes. It’s cold against my sweaty palm. I bit my lip. What if I didn’t like what it said?

Atreyu-  I don’t know.

Me- you should

I hold the hand in my hand, numbly staring out into space. Tears plaster my messy hair to my face. Eventually, I fall into a dark bliss as sleep overtakes me.