The Switch (GirlxGirl)

Chapter 4: Let Me Help

Song: Feeding the Fire - Hayley Kiyoko 

One thing is for certain. I must spend as little time with Elizabeth as possible. If I truly can't handle it, I will consider the possibility that I am attracted to women. I hate that I even have to consider it. It seems like everyone in the world knows for sure whether they're straight or not. For instance, everyone at school knows they're straight so well that even the possibility of being gay disgusts them. How are they so confident in that?

I guess I've always known I'm different but not in this way. In elementary school, when the other girls would watch the boys play at recess, I'd pick flowers for my friends. My teachers would say that I was only friends with the girls but I thought I just got along better with them. Did I subconsciously know that early on that I didn't like boys? That's not possible. I'm over thinking this. I'm not even gay.

"Xena." I look up from my music journal. For a moment, the bright sun blinds me as my eyes adjust to the mid morning light. "Xena!" They call again. I try to look at the face of the person standing above me but the sun is just too bright. "What are you doing here?" They ask critically. Suddenly, I recognise the voice. Shortly after that, Lily's defining features click in my mind. Her short, pastel pink hair, fake glasses and a large sweater.

"It's the park, a public place. A lot of people come here." I reply casually while closing my journal and watching Lily's eyebrows furrow. I smile innocently to get on her nerves.

"I meant what are you doing under my tree." I scoff at that. Her tree. Who does she think she is? Rolling my eyes, I make myself comfortable under the shade of the large tree.

"Like I said, this is a public park and therefore, it belongs to everyone." I inform her kindly. "Even lowlife bitches like me." I point to myself and smile, claiming the title. Lily smirks and crosses her arms.

"Actually the sign over there says people have to clean up the dog shit, I'm just making sure that happens." She grabs my arm and pulls me up to my feet. While I'm finding my balance, I glare at her. I have to admit that was a good one. How do people even come up with that shit?

"You learned how to read? I'm so proud of you!" Hey, that's the best I can do right now. I'm not good on my toes. Lily rolls her eyes and pushes me away from the tree.

"Just stay away from me Zero." She uses the nickname people called me all sophomore year. I guess they use it because it's close to Xena. I don't know. I think it's funny that they didn't find a word that actually starts with X. Nobody calls me that anymore, though. Probably because no one cares. Freshman and sophomore year, everyone cares about image and being popular but senior year, everyone is just living their life and freaking out about leaving their friends. Only the shallow people still care about social status.

"I don't know if you noticed because you're pretty self absorbed but you came up to me." I point out, not leaving her alone. I smirk and cross my arms, seeming confident. I've dealt with this girl for like 3 years. I know how to get on her nerves.

"Xena seriously leave. Connor is supposed to help me on my English homework." She whines. I guess she didn't learn how to read. I think to myself but I don't feel like being burned at the stake today so I don't say it aloud.

I'm not sure Connor would be much help to her, he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer. He only offered to help so he could hook up with Lily. Hell no, I'm not gonna let that happen. It would destroy Avalon.

One time, Avalon saw Connor kissing his girlfriend and she almost passed out. Kali and I had to steal her car keys so she couldn't go get more ice cream. I think she single handedly ran Ben&Jerry's out of business that day.