Things I Cannot Say

Kabanata 14

Kabanata 14

Nagbabatuhan ng linya ang mga tauhan sa telebisyon. Kung ano iyon ay wala akong ka alam alam. Lubhang mahirap intindihin ang mga salitang kanilang binabato sa isa't isa. I don't know what the hell is happening right now, but all I could guess is that they are in some sort of dispute. Mapula ang mukha ng isang babae nang dumapo ang palad ng kaniyang kausap. Napaawang ang bibig ng babae at itinaas ang mga bisig upang haklatin ang mga hibla sa buhok ng babae. Maybe they are fighting for the man they love.

Fight. Such a nice word. A nice word that isn't for everyone. It is for the braves and courageous. Not for a quitter. Not for me. I wonder if I could do that too. To fight for what I want. To fight for inevitable. To fight for what I think is right.

Patuloy na nag sakitan ang dalawang tauhan sa telebisyon. Natigilan lamang sila nang dumating ang isang lalaki na may makapal na bigote na parang kay Santa Claus. Pumagitna ito sa dalawa ngunit hindi natinag ang dalawang babae na naglalabanan.

Nilingon ko si Theo na matalim ang tingin sa telebisyon. Nanliliit ang kaniyang mga mata habang inoobserbahan ang mga galaw ng bibig ng tauhan. I can sense that he is trying his best to read the lines. Nilingon niya ako, ang balikat ay bumagsak sa pagsuko.

Are you sure you don't want to sleep yet?

Kinuha ko ang pen sa kamay ni Theo at nagsulat ng tugon.

I'm not in the mood to sleep Theo.

You sure? I don't want you to skip your sleep.

You're skipping your sleep.

Its because you're still awake. I want to keep an eye on you.

You don't have to. I can manage.

I cannot sleep unless I am sure that you're safe.

I'll be safe. I'm not going anywhere.

I don't want you to hurt yourself.

Why?

Because I want you to be okay. You're my friend.

Theo's eyes were full of emotion when I glanced at it. For once, ever since I came here in France, I saw genuine eyes who really cares for me. Sure, some might show caring towards me but you will know if its real if you look into the window on their souls. Feelings are hard to conceal in our own eyes. We can betray our mind but our eyes? It cannot.

I'm sorry if I became a burden to you lately.

Oh no. I am supposed to be the one who should be so sorry.

You saved my life. No need to be sorry about that Theo.

Makayla, I really wish you won't do that anymore.

I can't promise.

Why?

Theo, you won't understand.

I will. If I don't I will keep trying. I want to understand you.

You don't have to. I'm a mess.

We all are. But death doesn't deserves you. This world needs more of you.

How can you say that?