Part 15

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His eyes opened to see the hospital the same as when he had first closed them. Unchanged, and moving on with it's normal routine, oblivious to what was actually happening inside of it. Not that the building could even feel anything, it was a stack of bricks, and Edward knew that. Unfeeling, and cold, why would he even consider the fact of it's feelings in the first place? It didn't make sense. Hell, nothing in his mind was making sense. Not when a blantant possibility was staring him in the face. It was like a confrontation with Truth all over again. No, it was actually. It was a truth that was waiting for it's chance to become real, or fade back into the place where all untouched possibilities went. Where was that place exactly? No, he didn't want to know. Wherever it was it must've been some type of hell hole.

The truth being the fact that his meaning of existence could die that day. Winry, and the baby she had only been pregnant with for six months, six short months, could die in a cold, sterile operating room. When he thought about it, Winry would probably much rather die surrounded by her gears and wrenches, a scent of oil in the air.

He mentally slapped himself.

What the hell was that Ed? Why would you even consider where Winry would most likely want to die?! It's only a possibility! A fucking possibility! There's two sides to this! When they manage to make it through, even if the baby will be months early, he or she will be likely to live! It's not completely uncommon for premature infants to be born! It happens all the time, and in almost all of the cases that children survived! So stop acting like an idiot, and steel yourself up! You're better than this! Winry would kill you three times over with that wrench you got her if she saw you like this! Al would have to drag your sorry ass over to your grave, and you would deserve it too!

The desperate part of himself began arguing with the side that had almost given up. He could literally see it in his head. A gloomy version of him, a man who looked like he was burned at the stake, and the other a fuming devil with a glint in his eyes that refused to believe bullshit like Winry would die from this.

He shifted in his seat, and peered over at his left. Alphonse and May had joined him in his wait for any type of news. It seemed as though the doctor had called, or had someone call, Al and May before they could make it to Central. From what Al said, they had only just gotten half way when he heard a call had come for him. When they reached the hospital, Ed still hadn't moved from his spot in the middle of the hall. He had only adjusted his position from forearms and knees, to sitting crossed-legged, staring at his fists.

The pair had walked into the hall and found him a pathetic mess. He could only wonder what was going through their minds, but as he looked up when two feet appeared in front of him, and was met with Al's face contorted into sorrow, and helplessness, he had a fairly good idea.

They had helped him up, Ed not really caring whether he stayed on the floor or not, and dragged him along with them to the waiting room. A silent minute passed, and they reached the room that was their destination. Wooden chairs with auburn cushions lined the two opposite sides of the room, exactly seven on either side. Across from where you enter there was a fairly large window, big enough to take up more than half on the wall, and big enough to annoy the living hell out of Ed.

Which brings us back to the present time, Ed peered over to his left, and saw a sleeping Alphonse and May, leaning against each other. May had her tiny head on Al's shoulder, tear stains on her cheeks, and Ed almost felt bad for Al because of how much his head was leaning to the side to rest it on hers. He would definitely have a bad ache in his neck when he woke. And Ed would've found it hilarious, and make sure to tease Al about it when he gained consciousness, if it weren't for that truth of a possibility standing on the edge of a knife.

Four hours had passed, and still there was not a single word heard from the doctor, or anyone for that matter. C-sections were not supposed to take that long. Ed knew that for a fact thanks to all that researching he had done about pregnancy. Hell, he was practically a walking library when it came to pregnancy. Everything there was to know, he knew it. He knew the facts, the possibilities, the endless amount of effort that was needed by both the man and woman, he knew it all, but now when it counts the most, all that knowledge was doing nothing for him. It was all useless, just proving to him once again that he can't solely rely on knowledge. Though he wasn't surprised. Knowledge could only do so much, and when it reached it's point that's when action was needed, but that was just it. There was no action for him to take. No enemy for him to defeat. He was completely useless, and it was driving him to the edge of a cliff.

His eyes wandered the room, to the lamp on the end table, the radio sitting next to it, the rare person that would pass by the window on their way to somewhere, and finally, the door that he was so desperately waiting for someone to come through. But completely terrified for that someone to come through also.

God was he a man full of inner contradictions.

More silent minutes passed, edging him closer and closer to that cliff his mind had conjured up, when his ear twitched at the sound of someone stirring to his left. Al, who had passed out for a solid hour, blinked his mind awake and sat up, making May slide further down his shoulder. As he shifted around, his face flinched and his hand came up to rub his neck.

Called it.

"Brother?" Al turned his head to Ed, still rubbing his sore neck. "Anything I missed?"

"No," Ed answered almost sourly, "not one damn thing."

A pained look crossed Al's face. He also knew that this procedure wasn't supposed to take this long.

"I won't tell you not to worry, but it does make sense that they would take their time with this. Especially since Winry's sick, and it's still early for the baby. They're most likely trying everything they can to make the two of them comfortable throughout the whole thing." he wanted desperately to comfort his brother, but there was no way Ed would be cheered up now, not unless he saw Winry and his child's smiling faces.

Alphonse reached over and put a hand on Ed's back, giving his shoulder blade three gentle pats. Since oral support wasn't going to work, he may as well try physical. And to his surprise, Ed's expression softened in the slightest bit at the touch, though his eyes still refused to leave the door.

"Brot-"

"Al." Ed stopped him before he could speak.

"Yeah?"

He sighed, and somehow physically shrank into himself, "What do you think? What do you honestly think?" Ed hunched over and put his elbows on his knees, hands coming up just under his bangs, hiding his eyes.

"What do you mean brother?" Al's confusion shown through his voice.

"I mean," Ed sucked in a deep breath, already loathing the words that were about to leave his mouth, "do you honestly believe that the next time I see them they'll both be breathing? And I don't want some pretty speech about how I just have to believe that they'll make it out. The world, as we both know all too clearly, doesn't work that way. Just tell me what you're thinking."

At this sudden question, Al immediately began to turns the wheels of his mind, something he felt like he hadn't been doing before. It was hard, just telling him what he was thinking. Hard because he knew that it could go either way. There was an equal chance of them dying, to them living, but that wasn't something he wanted to say to his brother. He didn't want to repeat what Ed was probably already thinking in his head, it would be a waste of breath, but what else was there to say?

"Brother," he began his words, already feeling the shaky ground he was on, "I have to say that I'm probably thinking the same thing you are. Knowing that there are two possibilities hanging in the air. They might die. They might live." the words left a taste of vinegar as they left his mouth, but he kept going, "Sure we favor the latter, but it's not like that will do us any good. This is something that human being's can't wrap their minds around, much less control."

Al stopped and looked over at his brother, still a shrunken form, "I can't give you comforting words brother. And I can't lie, saying "Everything will be just fine!" when I have know idea if they will be. The sole thing you can do know, is ready yourself for what comes next. Be it buying months worth if diapers, or something else that I won't speak, you'll need to know that you can't run away from it."

"And I know that Edward Elric, former Fullmetal Alchemist won't run away, right brother?"

Ed lifted his head, looked to his little brother, who really acted like his older brother most of the time, and gave thought to what he said. To be honest he wasn't so sure about the running away part. If it came down to that, it just sounded like the better option.

Shut up Elric! The desperate part of him surfaced in his mind again, oh joy. Do you really think you can get away with taking off and forgetting all your problems?! To just throw your life into a spiral of absolutely no meaning?! No! You know you can't! What would that do to Al huh?! His last blood related family skipping off into crazy land? No way in hell! And I don't even want to think about what Winry would do if she saw that! She would probably give you a valid reason to enter crazy land! No just no! Shut that damned weak part of your mind up, and when the time comes, march into that delivery room and look into the open eyes of your wife and child!!

"Brother?" Al waved a hand in front of Ed's face, "Are you still there brother?"

A second passed, and Ed blinked himself back into reality. "Oh. Yeah I'm-"Click. The sound of a sound of a door opening quickly shut him up.

"Edward?"

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