We Both Fucked Up

22

TWO WEEKS LATER

Chris

I took in a pull of the third blunt that I smoked today. I could already tell that my eyes were low and red. "You still haven't eaten?" My mom asked me as she walked into the room. She scrunch her face up, "Why the hell you smoking that shit up in here?" She screamed fanning the air.

I put the blunt out before tossing it into the ash tray. "Ma you really bugging right now." I told her not in the mood for her shit. "Christopher Maurice Brown, you not gonna speak to me like I'm one of these little heifers in these streets."

"My bad ma." I apologized. For the past week and a few days, I've been in my ma's house because everything in my apartment smelled like Brianna and would remind me of her. She literally just disappeared without a trace and I was worried for her.

"Your breakfast is cold, why haven't you eaten yet?" She questioned pointing to the plate of food that sat on the side of my old bed. "I'm not hungry ma." I told her truthfully. I honestly didn't have an appetite.

She sighed before sitting on the edge of the bed besides me. "You gonna tell me what's wrong yet?" She asked. "I don't really wanna talk 'bout it." I replied. "It's about Brianna?" She ask continuing to press the issue.

I nodded my head. "She's been gone for two weeks and no one know where she at."  I decided to just tell her. "And she haven't been answering your calls or texts?"

I nodded my head. "There is something wrong with her, especially if she is not in contact with absolutely no one."

"I know. It just don't make any sense to me because she never really had problems with people. So it just leaves us at a dead end."

"You need to go around asking people if they seen her. This is something serious boy." She told me before getting up and leaving, allowing me to marinate in my thoughts.

Brianna

I felt a burning sensation on my arm. "Wake the fuck up." - "Ah shit." I tried to pick up my arm but it was bonded on the arm rest. Jade was burning me with the bud of a cigarette.

I felt weak, I didn't even know how long I've been down here. But I know it was for a very long time. I felt my body shutting down every day that passed. There was something going wrong inside my body but I didn't what it was.

I've been abused in all forms. I've raped by every single man here. I've been physically abused by my mother. Emotionally drained and I already gave up on life.

The cut on my cheek, healed and turned into a permanent scar. I closed my eyes back so she pressed the end of the bud against my arm harder. I lazily opened my eyes and she handed me a plate of scraps.

"Eat." She ordered as she untied the ropes from around my arms. I looked down and I automatically felt sick and had the feeling of throwing up. I did what she said either way, because if I didn't then she would get one of the guys to rape me.

I forced the food into my mouth. She watch me eat the food and when I was finished. She took the plate and left, leaving me all alone. Once again. I given up. I was trying to do everything for them to just kill me off.

Even though I'm in the worst situation that ever happened to me. I still thought about Chris. I wondered what was he probably doing at this moment. Probably out fucking other bitches.

It was no question that I love Chris. He is the only man that I fell deeply in love with. But, I can't see myself back with him. He did the one thing that I could never forgive him for. He shared the only thing that separated me and any other female, to someone else. Emotionally or physical, it broke my heart knowing that for one minute, he thought somebody was better than me.