My Crazy Hot Interstellar Affair

30. Man Likes Girlfriend's Current Molecular Configuration

"Andromeda." Oliver stopped navigating and regarded her with what looked like pity. "Star is a pleasure cruiser, not equipped with weaponry, except, of course, for her tail. But that isn't much help with long range battle."

"Are you kidding me?" The Big Guns icon sent a half-dozen more blasts their way. "Keep your eyes on the ... uh ... road ... I mean ... whatever. Look out!" Andie braced herself for impact.

Oliver snapped to attention and began evasive maneuvers, narrowly avoiding the first strike. "Thank you, Andromeda," he said.

"Any time," she squeaked. Once Andie's heart slowed to a mere jackhammer tempo, she thought of the question she'd been trying to form in her brain since the first time The Big Guns fired at them. "Oliver, your parents wouldn't blow up their heir, right? I mean, your mother missed killing you repeatedly back at the hangar. And none of The Big Guns blasts have blown us up. Either she's a bad shot, or she isn't serious about filicide."

"Sometime I will have to introduce you to my mother's temper. In the meantime, you need to be quiet and let me fly, because I am quite interested in keeping your molecules in their present configuration."

Although that last sentence was one of the most romantic utterances ever, Andie's face heated. "You did not just tell me to be quiet. I just saved our lives!"

Oliver fixed a serious, 'I mean business' gaze upon her, but the corners of his mouth twitched, exposing a hidden smile. "Do not worry, Andromeda. I will let nothing hurt you. As soon as we leave hyperspace, we should lose them. If they exit hyperspace a split second after we do, they will still be at least a parsec away. Do you trust me?" Oliver spun the ship again, avoiding a volley of fire. Oliver spared a glance in her direction. "Well?"

"I'm thinking."

They spurted out of fuzzy white hyperspace into the normal velvety blackness of space, near a solar system with two suns. As they neared the silvery moon of a red planet orbiting the smaller of the two sun, Andie recognized it from the intro to As the Earth Turns she saw on Oliver's TV. It looked more like a planet than a moon, with clouds and jagged-edged continents.

"We made it!" said Andie. "Now let's land and get Sterling. I knew I could trust you." She loosened her harness, leaned over the arm of her chair, and kissed him, hard. She felt a delicious tug in her nether-regions. But most likely, this wasn't the right time to have sex. Right?

"Uh ..." said Bad Andie. "Why not?"

She had a point.

His mouth moved beneath her lips. "Uh, Andie?" He pulled his head back.

"Yeah?"

A red blast streaked across their path; the impact so hard Andie's skull rattled. Star Force One whined at such a high pitch, it felt like someone had lit a blowtorch in Andie's ears. Bits of the ship's outer hull streamed into space. Google Galaxy dissolved. The cabin went dark.

"Do something," yelled Andie, because it was all she could think of to say. Her voice sounded strange and tragic inside her head. Oliver's lips moved, but Andie heard nothing. "I can't hear. What's happening?"

Oliver mimed holding his nose and breathing out as hard as possible. Andie did so. "Holy Toledo," she said. "That hurts."

"Can you hear now?" said Oliver.

The poor ship moaned in agony.

"What happened?" The ship continued her gut-wrenching sob.

"They shot off her tail. Damn Cyra! I am sorry, Star." Star cried even harder as her severed tail plummeted through a layer of clouds. "We've also lost navigation and life support. I cannot alter our trajectory." The hum of the engines died, and the ship tumbled into the moon's atmosphere.