Voltron One Shots

Shiro X Depressed!Reader

"I wish I could get of this place called Earth, stop being a part of this thing called society, and stop living in this thing called life."

That was the last thing I said to him before he disappeared, before I spent two years going through this wretched hell. I didn't kill myself, but Shiro practically committed suicide when he excepted the trip to Kergaros.

Ever since he disappeared I hadn't been able to move. My body wine into shock, I couldn't talk, but I sure as hell knew what was going on. The people who came to see me everyday, all dressed in white, with straight faces and clipboards.

They were all the same to me, but that wasn't the part that made my life hell. It was the memories, the random ones that would show up. I was having one right now, and it was the worst one yet.

"(Y/N), that's insane!" Shiro practically exploded and I looked over at him, not in the mood to even speak, but did so anyways.

"Look it's not crazy when everything around you is going to hell, when my parents died, my brother, my cousin, my aunt and uncle, everyone died Shiro. I can't help, but think I was supposed to go too. Yet, I'm still here... how?"

"It's what date intended-"

"What's with this fat bullshit? You and I both know the only reason I'm alive is because I'm the only one they would allow to go into surgery. It could have been anyone, but there weren't enough surgeon's that night, it should have been my brother." Shiro looked genuinely hurt, hell I couldn't blame him. I was having another episode, and why he stuck with me after the first never dawned to me.

"Look, I know you want to end this, but you've still got me, and Matt." He took my hands and I looked down, the way his hand's fit with mine, didn't make sense, but I like it. He took one hand and slowly peeled back my sleeve. His finger tips brushed over my new slits. "I know you're still affected... I want to help you, but you just have to let me."

He was too good for me. I knew it was just a matter of time before something happened. Both him and Matt left me. It was okay, I knew it was okay, I told myself they'd be back, but for the months they were gone I tried to commit suicide eighteen different times. I was alway stopped my Matt's sister or by Shiro's friend, Keith.

I don't know why they stopped me. I know I wasn't worth anything to them, I wasn't worth anything to anyone and I was going to end myself, someway somehow.

But then I got stuck, I kept getting stuck, it was almost as if something was telling me I can't die, no matter how much I wanted it.

"Why do you always treat me like a child!?" I screamed, throwing whatever I could grab at him. Shiro had to dodge books, pencils, even a stapler. "I don't want you to parade around with me, I never asked you to stop me from doing what I think is best!"

"I'm sorry... I just want to make sure you're always okay." He sighed, sitting down.

"Why do you do this to me?" I sunk to the floor, feeling tears roll down my face and he moved next to me. "Why won't you just let me end this hell?"

"Because I love you, and without you I wouldn't know what to do with myself. I'd probably end myself too."

"Then why don't we just go together?" I asked, I wanted to go, I felt the need to, the constant urge.

"I can't I still have to take care of Keith." He wrapped his arms around me, and I buried my face in his chest.

Once again he was too good for me, and I still kept on living. It became a repeating habit. I'd have a suicidal episode and Shiro and I would have a heart to heart talk that would last for two weeks and then I'd go a-wall again.

It surprised me that he'd never got bored of the routine. We dated for a year like this, practically having one sided arguments every night, until one month I stopped. I just didn't complain about living anymore.

That was when we stole something from each other in bed. It was oddly enjoyable, which I had never thought I'd live to do in my life, but the next morning was like a dream, the night before a distant memory.

"Morning," Shiro mumbled, from my neck and a smile appeared on my face. No that he could see it, but I could feel it for sure.

"Morning." I sighed and the smile faded, but I still felt fluttery.

The peaceful silence lasted for a minute.

The dorm door slammed open and Matt barged in. "SHI- OH MY GOD!" He turned around and ran out of the room, covering his eyes. I looked over at Shiro and he sighed. We had to get up, despite me being the most tired in my entire life.

That never really confirmed anything, but the memory woke my body up. After it faded I could move. I was sitting and there was a small tray of food next to me. Typical.

There was silverware, a sharp knife was the first thing I laid eyes on. I took the blade in my hand, slowly, my body fatigued from the lack of movement. I brought the blade over my heart and felt my hands shake and I put enough pressure to draw blood, I attempted to go deeper when the television blinked on.

"Two of the pilots from the Kergeros Mission have been found and returned to Earth safely, Takashi Shirogan and Matthew Holt have both been submitted to Garrison Hospital to make a full recovery-" the tv turned off again. I dropped the knife and turned to see Keith standing by the door.

"Hey," he flashed a small smile and I felt tears come to my eyes. "I made a deal with you, and you're already going to break it?"

"No suicide." I whispered and swung my legs over the bed. "I know... can I see Shiro?"

"Sure, why the hell not?" He shrugged and I smiled, a genuine smile for the first time in year. I didn't want to kill myself yet.