Chapter 14

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Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

The timing is so wrong. What should I do now?

"We'll leave you guys here. I'll come back when Yuggy's up," Aileen bids.

They have a performance today and they asked me last week if I could do Yugyeom's face paint since I am pretty good at painting. I had agreed and forgotten about it since last night. I was a mess.

Dang, it's awkward.

He called it off last night. Just last night. And now we're the only ones in this room, faces practically just an inch away from each other. BUT ALL I WANT TO DO IS TO SLAP HIM. What kind of torture is this?

"Close your eyes," I instruct. He follows and I just want to pull his eyelashes, you know! I hate how he's so beautiful! I hate him!

I start drawing the symbol that Aileen told me but my eyes are tearing up.

"Is it okay?"

"No, I'm not," I blurt out while wiping a lost tear. "I mean, no, I'm not done yet. Wait a sec."

I want to punch you.

I manage to calm down before ordering him to open his eyes. He doesn't look at me and instead picks up a lipstick.

"Do you know how to put that?" I ask.

He opens the tube and tries to put some on. His hand seems to have a tremor.

"Let me do it," I say before taking the lipstick from him.

I hold his chin and tilt it up. I erase the stray lines with my thumb. I focus on his lips. It's better this way. I'll just think that he's gay. Yep, he's gay that's why I'm doing his make up right now. He's gay, that's why he left me.

Goddamnit, here we go again.

"Is it done?"

I quickly stand up when I hear Aileen's voice. "Yeah. I'll go back to the room."

"No, wait. You can stay. We asked the professor to excuse you too. Accompany Yugyeom while he's in the backstage. He'll be shy when he's alone."

No one laughs at her joke. This is the hard part when your relationship is in public. Heck, we're not even in an official relationship yet. But everyone knows how close we are, to the point that being called as just friends can be an insult to what we have. Too bad rumours don't travel fast and they don't know that we're done. If they do, they won't be even asking me to stay in somewhere where he is there too. The room is too small for us two.

Maybe Gyeommie-I mean, Yugyeom, is right. I talked too much about what's happening to us so now, I'll be the one to suffer in adjusting.


I awkwardly stay beside Yugyeom as he waits for his cue to go on stage. Some crew has to pass by us so I almost stumble to keep my balance, avoiding both the crews and the guy beside me. He must've seen my struggle so he holds my shoulder and leads me to stand in front of him. He lets me go after everyone has passed by, and I awkwardly side-steps to regain my distance.

This will be a rocky road. Why did you have to give up on me?

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