Ethan Dolan Found My Diaries

Chapter 5

It was turning 7:30 and me and Lexi hadn't even thought of anything.

I served the girls the fish fingers.

"I'm going to put them to bed, you can use my laptop to do anything." I said to Lexi.

She nodded and I left her in the kitchen.

After half an hour of fighting with the girls to get them into bed, I managed to get the into their bedroom and in their pyjamas.

They had pushed their beds together so they could sleep next to each other. Teddies, Barbies, Dolls, Play Mobil and every toy a kid could want was thrown on the floor.

I used all of the money I had to give the girls a normal childhood.

Lexi was stood in the doorway watching me read them to sleep smiling shyly.

"They're lucky to have you and Grayson." Lexi whispered when we were back in the kitchen.

"I've got an idea." Lexi said.

"Thank the lord." I said. We had been sat here for two hours and we had nothing.

"We could write about the stars in the sky and why they are special to us."

"Okay...." I said confused.

"Okay, have you lost anyone you love?" She asked.

Deep breath.

"My Mamma and my younger brother."I said.

It was quiet.

"Have you?" I asked.

"My Dad." She said.

What?

"There was a car crash."

Crap, I said that out loud.

"He was driving me back from a dance competition. My Dad used to be in a gang and the gang leader was mad he left the gang. He drove a van into our car. I only survived because he threw himself over me. He survived the crash. He was lying in his seat covered in blood. A fire started and I couldn't drag him out. I couldn't save him. The seatbelt was stuck. He used all of his last energy to throw me out of the car so I wouldn't be part of the explosion."

Lexi was sobbing. I realised I was crying a tiny bit as well.

"After that my Mum decided se couldn't cope and became an alcoholic. She's never home and she doesn't tell me where she goes and it's so scary at night. There are bangs and shouting everywhere and it's dark and I hate it so much."

"Before my Dad died, he told me that when he died he was going to be the brightest star in the sky. That's where my surname comes from and that's why I love space so much."

I got up from where I was sat. Walked over and hugged her.

"When ever your Mum disappears, promise you'll come and stay at my house."

She nodded and she sobbed into my shoulder and I held her until she stopped crying. She was still gorgeous even when she cried.

When she had done crying she looked up at me.

"How did your Mum die?"

"Suicide."

It was silent.

"How-"

"Before my Mamma met Sun, Moon and Star's Dad, it was just my Mamma, Me, Grayson and My Dad and my little brother James. My Dad turned out to be a drug addict and drug dealer. When my Mamma found out, he became abusive until my Mamma kicked him out. After that he did everything to try and mess up our lives. He would follow us home. Send millions of texts and then eventually he drove a car into our house trying to kill my Mum but he got James instead. James died."

"We moved to a new town and My Mum met Sun, Moon and Star's Dad, Charlie who me and Grayson call Dad. They got married and she got pregnant. Then My biological Dad came back and made my Mum overdose on drugs."

"Grayson couldn't cope and moved to a school far away and I rarely see him any more."

Lexi looked shocked.

"What she didn't realise is she didn't stop the sadness and pain, she gave it to me to deal with." I said.

Lexi hugged me.

"Stay over tonight."

Lexi raised her eyebrow.

"Please, I don't want to be alone tonight."

So me and Lexi cuddled up in my bed.

For the first time in my life I had just told my story.