Today was a bittersweet farewell, the final opportunity to hold you in my hand. As your ashes peacefully drifted away on the ocean waves that once brought you joy, I witnessed a moment of collective reflection and bidding farewell. Holding my mother and you together for the last time and cherishing the echoes of your laughter in the wind was a profound experience.
With each proud surge of the waves, a fragment of my heart shattered. As my mother clung to you with tightly clenched knuckles, tearfully unwilling to say goodbye, a gentle touch to her shoulder signalled that it was time to release you into the crystal blue waters.
A part of me longed to follow you on this final journey. As my mother's tearful embrace touched my skin, the protective walls I had erected crumbled under the weight of her sorrow. The mingling of ocean salt and my tears broke down the defences that once stood tall. The realization that you are genuinely gone finally sinks in, dispelling the notion that it was all a cruel, lingering dream. The heaviness in my chest confirms that this profound sadness is, unfortunately, the new reality I must face for the remainder of my days.
When the darkest thought invaded my mind, the weight on my shoulders became almost unbearable, urging me to collapse. "I no longer have a father," a chilling sensation crept down my spine, sending shivers through my entire being. I will never witness the day I walk down the aisle with my father holding my arm. He will miss my graduation, and my words will transform into a testament of resilience and perseverance through adversity rather than merely reaching for one's ambitions and maintaining faith. I will never experience the moment when my father becomes a grandfather with my mother by his side. These seemingly insignificant dreams hold immense meaning to me and are the only visions that occupy my mind as I eventually find sleep.
As the sun sinks below the horizon and the waves grow calm, a personal battle rages within my heart, a conflict only just beginning.
YOU ARE READING
The Thoughts of a Broken Soul
Poetrythese are a collection of my poems from the years a lot of them have secret meaning or are about people in my life I have loved and lost. I hope you enjoy my works :)
