Chapter 16 - All I do is say goodbye

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Dear JJ,
For 3 years I sold a lie to myself. I awoke 3 months after being in a coma, my grandfather had given me his left kidney since mine was destroy in the accident. I never knew he love me that much, my grandmother explain they gave me tough love because they thought that was the reason they lost my mother. They did not give her enough tough love, but it was the reason they had lost me. When I awoke you were the first person I wanted to see but I could not hurt you. I saw you at my grave the pain I had bestowed on you, I never wanted to hurt you like that again.

I thought distance was what you need but it's what I wanted. I never thought about you and I am sorry Jay. All i do is hurt you, in this life all I have ever done was say goodbye to you. I never wanted to hurt you like that again Jay, but how can I face you?
I saw my brother a few days ago he told me about how well you are doing running my restaurants, I hope you are not doing what you love because of me. I knew music was your passion so please don't give it up because of me. You have given me enough, thank you for that.

I am writing this but I don't think I have the guts to post it, please know I love you but I can't hurt you again, how can I face you? I won't be angry if you hate me, I will hate me too.

I know it means nothing but I love you and I will always,

Your Angel

I folded the letter and placed it in another white envelope, this must have been the 100th time I wrote that letter. I placed it on over the fire to burn but I could not bear burning another letter.everyone beside Jay had found out that I was still alive, today I got the guts to give him the letters I had written back to him. I hid myself in one of the many rooms at my brother's house. I looked out the window and saw him leaving, my heart said follow and I foolishly did. I pick myself up and headed out the back door.

I want to know if he was feeling better now? He did not go to her grave, he went to the field of Dandelions. He picked a few and wished upon them, I wanted to hug him but I could not. This was my goodbye. I needed to leave and and never return; but All I could think about was the many times he held on to me. My brain said no but my heart was in control, it led me out of the darkness. The distance between just had complete vanished. He rose his head and i saw the pain I had engulfed him in. His eyes pulse with love through them however.

I am sorry Jay
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THE END 

you make a wish......

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